Sometimes I think a lot on night shifts and other times, I simply survive.
Tonight is a thinking night. The unit is quiet, all of our little munchkins sound asleep- for the moment. It was a beautiful day today. I caught about an hour of sun before I began driving down the highway, windows down, music blaring, singing at the top of my lungs. It felt good.
Tonight feels good, too; there is so much running through my head. Thoughts of now, thoughts of later, "what-if's", and "how's about's". I've been praying for a few specific things lately. Over and over, pounding the throne of Heaven with the same two or three requests. I'm glad my God is faithful. When these requests are answered, or move forward, it will be an amazing adventure.
I just keep thinking of Matthew 6. The chapter that tells us not to worry about tomorrow, to ask and ask, and to realize that God knows what we need. Oh goodness. I can't count the number of times I've sunk down to my floor, opened up to the same spot and read these few verses over the last few years. Many circumstances have worried me, many I have wrestled with, and many nights I've laid awake, finally laying whatever is it down because of sheer necesscity and lack of anything better to do. Aren't you so glad for those moments?
I read on a friend's site a few days ago that a definition for faith is this:
Full persuasion, total confidence, absolute certainty.
I want to be fully persuaded, to never have a doubt in my heart, to trust with the eyes of a child. Unfortunately, last time I checked, I wasn't done growing, so I'm still a bit short of my goal.
All of this has lead me to one conclusion. I must pray. Pray for specific needs, pray for healing, pray for change, pray for more of Holy Spirit, pray for faith, and the list goes on. So, I'm praying. I'll let you all know how it turns out.
P.S. - new pictures coming soon. I've been busy.