Monday, April 7, 2008

Audrey Caroline

It's odd how we are humans are so...dichotomous in our emotions. I know that's a big fancy word, but really. I love how it's completely possible to have joy in your heart and want to let out tears of mourning in the same instant.

If you haven't read or followed Audrey Caroline's blog, little Audrey was born today at 4:31pm with fiery red hair into a family that loved her fiercely. This same family said goodbye to her today as well. She went to be with Jesus at 6:45pm.

So while I'm happy that our God gave her breath even for just those two hours, I'm mourning that such a beautiful little one was not for here. I'm mourning that there is a mom tonight, in the hospital recovering from a C-section, on a postpartum unit with no baby in the nursery. It breaks my heart and it's not fair. Events like this make me long for the Lord to just come back and make it right again.

I am filled with joy though, that little Audrey was able to hear her mom and dad's voice, be held by her sisters, and experience the love of the family the Lord entrusted her to for those two precious hours and all the long months of waiting and praying before this day. It makes my heart happy that Audrey's mom was able to hold her, feel Audrey's little 3lb body in her arms and rock her. I think every mom longs to do that, just to hold her child in her arms and let them know that she is there and everything will be ok.

So, it was a joy/sad day in my heart today.
Here's Audrey Caroline's blog if you'd like to read.

The entire blog is real, honest and open about Audrey, Jesus and the faith that comes in even the hardest of circumstances. It's amazing.

P.S. - Please pray for Audrey's mom tonight. She still has a long recovery from her C-section today.

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