Another Day Forever

Keys in the Car, Not my Pocket

2011-12-15T19:54:00.000-05:00

Its been an interesting day.

I woke up, planned out my day, had a very awesome smoothie for breakfast and set out upon some Christmas errands. My last errands, might I add. My days left before Christmas are rapidly filling up. So crazy, but like always.

I ended up at Wal-Mart, because when do errands not end up at Wal-Mart? Anyway, the Wal-Mart I was at is on top of a hill. I apparently didn't realize how windy it is because I opened my door a smidge without holding onto it. The wind almost immediately pushed my door into the beautiful shiny red car next to me.

Oh no.
I cringed.
Inspected the damage.
Paint was scratched.
No ding.

Then, what to do? I started to look for a piece of paper to leave my info, when the owner walked up.

"Hi. Is this your car? I need to give you my insurance information, I just accidentally dinged your car with my door."

Then, while I was writing down information for her, the wind blew my door closed....with my keys and wallet on my front seat.

Sigh.

I called the police. They wouldn't come, because there was no one in the car. Then, I called my car insurance. We don't have road side assistance. Dang. Thought we did! Finally, I called my hubby in tears. He suggested I call his mom to come get the spare from him and bring it to me.

She's wonderful and she agreed. Unfortunately, Justin's work and Wal-Mart are about 40 minutes apart.

I can't leave the car because the keys and my wallet were in plain sight on the front seat.
It wasn't too cold out today, but because of that, I didn't bring a hat or a scarf.
I realized it was colder than I thought, really quickly.
But, I was ok.
Then it started to rain.

Double sigh.

Luckily it stopped and Diane came and rescued me.
My fingers were frozen, but defrosted nicely once I was back in the car and on my way home.
Yay for heaters and no one else in the car so I could blast the heat on high all the way home.

Odd day.

This Week's Meal Plan

2011-12-01T12:55:00.001-05:00

My dear friend Ashley commented yesterday on a post in which I said I would post some meal plans while I am on this elimination diet for my migraines so you all can see what I'm eating.

I'd forgotten about that, so I thought I'd remedy it. Here is my sample meal plan for this week. I go Tuesday to Monday cause my hubby gets paid on Mondays and I grocery shop after that.

Some general notes:
For breakfast, I always have oatmeal, bacon or eggs in some shape or form...so I don't include those in the meal plans. Makes for boring repetitive writing. I make a list of snacks each week and pick from the list every day for snacks. I also only make a "dessert" once per week or when I'm craving something dessert-y. On days that I work I usually don't have a real dinner. I have a combo of snacks and leftovers!

My recipes are some from my hubby, some from online, some from cookbooks and some from my head. If I have a link to a recipe, I'll throw it in!

Oh, one last thing. My hubby is on a diet and works at a restaurant during the day and so only eats dinners with me. He also doesn't eat leftovers....so I don't need to always cook a ton of food. Mostly just cooking for me. I also buy snacks for him that I can't eat so he has his own "go-to" foods when he needs a quick snack.

Tuesday:
Lunch: Stuffed sweet potato squash with ground lamb/goat cheese
Dinner: Seared Tuna Stead with sauteed green beans and quinoa

Wednesday (work):
L: Thanksgiving leftovers from the freezer
D: Stuffed squash leftovers

Thursday:
L: Chicken salad on rice crackers
D: Oven roasted chicken with mashed cauliflower/parsnips with leeks and roasted brussel sprouts

Friday:
L: Veggie Latke's with left over oven roasted chicken
D: Gluten free chicken and dumpling soup (Using this dumpling recipe)

Saturday (work):
L: Soup leftovers
D: Leftover mishmash or snacks

Sunday (work):
L: Soup leftovers
D: Roasted beef shank in crockpot with mashed parsnips

Monday:
L: Beef shank leftovers
D: Stir-fry with whatever meat I feel like that day and veggie mix from the freezer with brown rice

Snacks for the Week:
Raw almonds
Sheep/goat milk yogurt
Goat cheese with rice crackers and smoked salmon
Plain hummus with veggies
Celery with natural peanut butter
Brown rice cakes with artichoke dip on top
Apple with natural peanut butter

Desserts for the week!
Coconut Milk Custard (will blend that recipe with this one and only use liquid stevia as the sweetner)

I WANT YOUR PIZZA!

2011-10-22T21:50:00.000-04:00

Today I felt the urge to wrestle a piece of pizza from a two year old and shove it in my mouth.

It wasn't like she was really eating it. No, she was using the pizza to dip into the ketchup and then licking the ketchup off the pizza. YUM. Oh to be two again....

It's funny with this whole restricted diet thing. I've been doing well, not a whole lot of cravings and then- BAM! I sat down to help this two year old eat her lunch and I WANTED her pizza. WANTED.

Sigh.

I miss cheese. Pizza. Cake. Cookies.
I want to feel better, but wouldn't it be nice to have your cake and eat it, too sometimes?

The Diet

2011-10-22T11:00:00.000-04:00

This has been the big deal around my house lately. I've been doing crazy diets for the last six months, trying to rid myself of migraines. Well, they've all been leading up to this mega-diet. The short run down is, I need to give my liver/adrenals/gut a rest and figure out what food my body likes and can handle and which foods it hates and can't handle.

A lot of the symptoms I have are common to people with gluten intolerance and dairy intolerance. Sigh. Sometimes though, it's just that your gut is angry and once it's not angry, you'll be able to eat those things. We know my gut is angry, because yeast have taken it over and are reproducing, not giving the good guys a chance to fight back. This explains many of my gastro symptoms. I'm hoping I'm not truly intolerant to gluten or dairy, but if I am, it won't be the end of the world. There are lots of alternative things I can eat. I won't die. (I keep telling myself this....I'm SUCH a dairy girl.)

All these angry things in my gut could be overtaxing the gut, which is an insult to the body, which could and would produce headache. So, this diet is an elimination diet. Everything that might be causing a problem, we took out of my diet. Oh, and we also have to kill off the yeast, so I can't eat anything that feeds them. Plus, I'm taking a probiotic so the good guys can move in as the bad guys die. Complicated, huh?

What I can't eat:
Dairy
Gluten
Sugar/honey/any sweeteners except for pure stevia
Certain veggies: corn, peas, white potatoes, bananas

Alcohol
Caffeine
Table salt
MSG

What I can eat in limited quantities:
Brown rice/quinoa - 1/2 cup 3x/day max
Raw non-roasted/salted nuts and seeds - a small handful 3x/day max
Fruits - apple, pear or berries only once per day
Tomatoes - once per week
Fish - twice per week
Mushrooms - limit

What I CAN eat:
Filtered water
Herbal teas with Stevia
Vegetables
Beans - green, black, kidney, lentil
Peanut butter (counts a nut serving for the day)
Brown rice crackers (counts as a grain serving)
Brown rice cakes with peanut butter (counts as a grain and a nut serving)
EGGS
Organic/grass fed red meat, chicken, turkey, venison, ham, pheasant, duck, pork
Almond milk
GOAT CHEESE <---- my new best friend
EVOO/unprocessed canola oil/coconut oil/raw flax oil
Apple cider vinegar/rice vinegar/balsalmic vinegar
Real sea salt or Dead Sea salt

I know many of you are shaking your heads, asking what in the world I am going to eat. Well, luckily Dr. Shaw had a cookbook that he emailed me. These recipes got me through the first week. Then I did some googling and realized that the diet he has me on is very similar to the GAPS diet. There are MANY sites with GAPS recipes. My diet also has many similarities to the Paleo Diet and there are also many free recipes for that. Plus, the cookbook I have, Nourishing Traditions, has many recipes that are ok on my diet and many others that can be modified to be ok. I'm eating, I promise.

Perhaps I shall post my first week's meal plan for you all. We'll see.

New Plan for the Head

2011-10-21T20:00:00.000-04:00

I went to Dr. Shaw last week. He spent an hour with Justin and me discussing why he thinks I have migraines and how I can feel better. We talked not just about my head, but about other concerns I've been having. Things like being itchy all the time, thirsty, tired even when I sleep for ten hours, nauseous, odd pains in my side/back and I could go on. I had written down every symptom I have had over the past five years and still currently have. The list took up three notebook pages. I'm 27 and I firmly believe I should be feeling better than this. I knew there had to be a solution, not just to my headaches, but to feeling better in general.

We talked about a lot at the appointment. Dr. Shaw's explanation of my biochemistry made sense and his theory of what is wrong inside of me fits all my symptoms. He drew pictures, we asked questions and I cried. It just all seems so obvious now and simple. It won't be simple to fix, but it's fixable and I'm excited for that. I won't go over biochemistry here, because I'm tired of explaining it and I can't do it justice on the internet. I'm just going to list things and hopefully, it'll all make sense to you. If not, that's ok. It makes sense to me.

Problems:

1. Low iron/anemic
2. Adrenal fatigue
3. Systemic yeast overgrowth
4. Overworked liver
5. Probable estrogen dominance
6. Migraines (obviously)

Fixes:
1. Iron vitamin, three times per day
2. Adrenal support vitamin, three times per day
3. Probiotic once at night (for now, might up it later)
4. Liver detox vitamin, twice per day
5. Nothing, this should fix itself as the adrenals are fixed.
6. Magnesium twice per day, B vitamin three times per day and an elimination diet

I'll talk more about the elimination diet in another post. I think that's rather enough for now. For the record, I'm taking pills at four different times each day and I'm ingesting 16 pills per day. It's all a little overwhelming right now, but I just keep hoping and praying that it will work in the end. If it does, then all this is MORE than worth it.

Abolishing Migraines

2011-10-20T23:31:00.000-04:00

I feel like everything has been a whirlwind lately.

Justin is having surgery on Wednesday to open up his nasal passages. This will hopefully make his sleep apnea MUCH better, hopefully almost completely resolving it. If not, we still have a few other people to visit for him.

I found out I could test out of a class, studies, took the test, got a 71% when I needed an 80% and then realized I could have used the book. And I didn't. Yeah. I'm trying not to dwell on it. It's ok. Let it go. It's ok. Let it go. I'm just repeating that to myself, over and over til I believe it. And- well, I'm going to stop there, cause my heart rate is starting to rise. It's ok. Let it go.

deep breath

My project at work is ongoing and going well. I just desperately need more data for it. Desperately. By the first week of November preferably. Data is such a pain to collect, I almost feel guilty asking people to help me out and collect it. But I do. Hopefully by the end of the year, this project will be wrapped up and I can stop coercing people to help me.

Finally, I started a new treatment plan for my migraines. I met with a new doctor, Dr. Shaw two days after the Women of Faith conference I went to. I had an idea of what he was going to ask me to do diet wise. He confirmed all that, threw in a few things I didn't anticipate and gave me vitamins. I'll do a post on the specifics later, but basically, I'm doing an elimination diet right now. I have taken all possible allergens out of my diet for a month. Hopefully in that time, my headaches will calm down and by the end of the month, I'll be able to add things back in one at a time and see if I react. This will help me pinpoint any more dietary triggers. In the meantime, I'm taking 15 pills of vitamins a day to help out my low stores, boost my energy and lower my migraine threshold.

The point of all this is not just to decrease my headaches, it's to get rid of them. A lot of days, that goal seems rather farfetched to me, but Dr. Shaw is pretty confident that we can get rid of them, or at least greatly lower the frequency and severity. I'll take either.

Women of Faith - Imagine in Pittsburgh!

2011-10-14T21:32:00.000-04:00

So, I was able to go to the Women of Faith Imagine conference in Pittsburgh this past weekend. I have never been and was a bit skeptical at first. When I walked in Friday morning, I wasn't sure it was going to be super relevant to me. After listening to the speakers on Friday morning, I actually wasn't planning on coming back for the evening. It was neat, informative and GOOD information...but nothing special and a little boring. Plus, I was COLD. FREEZING. The conference was in a hockey arena, so I should have expected that. Anyway.

I did decide to come back Friday night, to see if it would be different AND I got my friend Nikki to come with me, so I was happier. I am so glad I went back. First thing back Friday night, the MC introduced all the ladies involved with the conference. Everyone that speaks and participated sits right off the stage on a "Porch" and they provide commentary in between speakers. The Porch did it for me. All the speakers and such feel like they are really close to each other. They provide community and a family feel to the conference, which made their talks all the more impacting They make you feel like part of the family...which is what made me love it.

My favorite speaker was Angie Smith. She was the one that I had been dying to hear talk all weekend and she did not disappoint. My cousin and I cried througout her story as she talked about losing her two hour old daughter after her birth. She also talked about having faith, stepping out of the boat and trusting Jesus. She ended with this: "He is everything". And He is. So nice to have a reminder.

The other speaker that has stayed with me is Nicole Johnson. She talked about anger as a woman and rooting it out of your life. I have always struggled with anger....although it may not seem like it to most. Just ask my sister....she's seen it, unfortunately. I feel like I've really dealt with a lot of the anger I had as a kid and young adult, but it rears up now and again. Especially when I am not feeling well, headache, hormonal, etc. Sigh. So much to work on. So thankful for my Savior who gives GRACE.

GRACE GRACE GRACE.
We all need it.

I really enjoyed the conference and would love to go back next year. You should check it out!! They are actually coming back to Pittsburgh next September!! Wanna go with me?

Imagine - Women of Faith Conference

2011-09-14T21:26:00.003-04:00

Well, we are back from Yellowstone and I survived. hehe. No, I had fun! I have many stories to share, after I finish our ninety piles of laundry. (Almost done - yay me!)

Anywhoo, just wanted to let you all know that the Women of Faith conference Imagine is coming to Pittsburgh VERY SOON, on Oct 7th & 8th, and I was given two free tickets in return for blogging about it. Not a bad deal. Actually an awesome deal, because I've always wanted to go and just never have because of finances, time, etc. But this year, I get to go and I'm super excited. (!!!) One my favorite bloggers, Angie Smith, is going to be there and I can't wait to hear her speak. And there will be other people, amazing people, I'm sure, I just don't remember who they are. But Angie will be there! Yay.

Here is a preview video for ya'll:

If you'd like to go, just click on the Women of Faith badge on my blog on the left hand side. I'd love to see you there!

Book Review: Sweet Sanctuary

2011-08-06T23:20:00.000-04:00

I am tired, but this post has been a long time coming. It's coming because I want to keep feeding my desire to relax and read good fiction whilst I relax. Every time I review a book, I can get another one! Kinda like the library. Scroll to the bottom of this post to read the full disclosure.

Anywhoo, I recently read Sweet Sanctuary by Sheila Walsh & Cindy Martinusen-Coloma. It's a fiction story of a women named Wren and her little boy Charlie. Wren (a name I love by the way!) has been a single mom to Charlie since his Dad left when he was two months old. They lead a quiet life, which Wren likes and live in a little town in a cottage on the edge of her family's vacation house property. The vacation house has a lot of memories, a few in particular that are not pleasant and Wren is slightly unsettled about living there. But, it's a nice quiet life, she likes her job, Charlie is happy and so they stay. This all changes one day when Wren's grandmother comes to the door and pretty much unends all of Wren's neatly made plans by inviting Wren's siblings back to the property to reunite after many years. Throw into the mix a new possible job offer for Wren, an interview at a new school for Charlie, a possible romantic interest for Wren, hostile siblings and unpleasant old memories and you get this beautifully crafted story.

I really liked this book. It wasn't very predictable, had quiet a few plots twists and actually kept me guessing til the very end, which I loved. The characters are very real and the book paints Wren's faith in a realistic way as she goes through some of the hardest months of her life. It's sweet, funny and has a great faith-based message. I's pretty much the perfect mix of suspense, romance, easy reading and sweetness for a late night read. I would recommend reading this one and maybe buying it to read a few times over. I don't usually buy books, but this one would be a good one to have around for a late night fiction fix.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Update on David

2011-07-29T00:10:00.000-04:00

It's been such a whirlwind the last two days and I am exhausted. Here is the short version of the last two days, bullet point-ish style.

David has second degree (we think, never got a straight answer on this) superficial burns that cover about 18-20% of his body surface. He is burned on the backs of his hands and arms from fingertips to elbows and both his legs from knee to ankles all the way around. He also has mild first degree burns on his face, which is already peeling away with new pink skin underneath. In comparison to other burn victims, he's pretty lucky. He did not need skin grafts and the doctors at the burn unit say he should heal up nicely. They said he should not scar.

Getting him home from the hospital was all about pain control. Medically, he was stable to come home yesterday, but they had not yet gotten his pain under control. They changed up his regimen and the type of bandages they were putting on him. It seemed to help, but my oh my. It was still a rough day.

We brought David home this afternoon in rush hour Nashville traffic. Not a good time. With all the pain meds on board, David was very nauseous. Two hours and fifteen minutes in a car, an hour of which was spent in bumper to bumper traffic and the last hour spent on windy country roads, does not make for a happy nausea-free car trip. It seemed like forever, but we got him home and he's comfy in his bed.

The goals for the next few days are to keep him up and walking, keep his new growing skin stretched out, keep his dressings clean and intact until he goes back to the hospital on Monday or Tuesday to have his dressings changed, keep his pain under control and get TONS of calories/protein in him for wound healing.

It's going to be a long road, but being home definitely helps!
Thank you for your prayers, please keep praying.

Nashville Unexpectedly

2011-07-27T11:30:00.001-04:00

I am sitting in the Nashville, TN airport. Somewhere I wanted to visit someday, but not like this.

So many thoughts running through my head. Mom is coming to pick me up soon and we'll head over to the hospital, I assume, to see how David is doing.

For those of you that don't know, my step-father David had an accident involving a fire yesterday. He suffered burns (I don't know the extent yet) and was life flighted to the nearest burn unit. It's the Vanderbilt Medical Center burn unit an hour and a half away from their house. My mom got the call that he was being life flighted while she was at work. Of course, it terrified her and she drove all the way to Nashville immediately without knowing what was going on.

Right now, David is stable and they think the burns are second or third degree, but they will not be able to stage them accurately until tonight. I'm anxious to get there, see how he is, make sure they are taking good care of him (I am sure they are and I know squat about burns and burn care anyways). I also want to make sure my mom is ok. I'll be here through Saturday. Hopefully we'll be able to take David home before then.

Please pray for my Mom and David.

- Pray that they are strengthened and given peace in this time. It's been a rough past 3 months for them as they just moved to KY at the beginning of May this year
- Please pray for depression/anxiety/hopelessness to be lifted from David and for him to have strength and peace from God in this time.
- Pray for wisdom for them both for medical decisions in the next few days.
- Pray for quick healing for David and for adequate pain control. He suffers from chronic pain (fibromyalgia, previous neck/back surgeries) as it is, now add acute injury onto it....can't even imagine.
- Pray for the doctors and nurses taking care of him that they would be blessed and have wisdom in his care.

I'll post more with more specifics when I know no more.
Thank you for praying for us.

Book Review: Healing Hearts by Beth Wiseman

2011-07-23T12:35:00.001-04:00

This is another book I received for free from Thomas Nelson Publishers in extra for my unbiased review, good or bad. See below for more details.

This book is a compilation of three novellas by Beth Wiseman. All the stories take place in Amish-country and the main characters are Amish.

The first novella is "A Choice to Forgive" and was really sweet. In it, Lydia's husband Elam has died about a year ago. What throws the story for a twist is that Elam's brother, Daniel suddenly shows up on her front porch. Normally, this is not a big deal, but fifteen years ago, Daniel and Lydia were planning on marrying and then Daniel dissappeared without telling Lydia. Lydia ended up marrying his brother, Elam instead. Her heart was hurt and this book chronicles how Lydia deals with Daniel being back. This one has a surprise plot twist in the middle.

The second novella is called "Change of Heart" and it's main character is Leah. Leah is an Amish woman who loves to write and stinks at about everything else Amish women are supposed to be good at. Further, she's not interested in marrying right now, but a certain boy is interested in her. This one was my favorite!

The third novella is called "Healing Hearts" about a husband, Naaman, who up and goes on vacation without his family and doesn't come back for a year. His wife, Levina is surprised when he comes back. This story is about Levina and their children dealing with Naaman being back all this time. This story has a really great message when you read it the whole way through. Very encouraging.

I wasn't sure I'd like these after I read the first story. It sort of dragged and was predictable. Until the plot twist. However, I LOVED the second story and the third one was really encouraging. It has a great message and gives you cause to think. These were easy to get through, entertaining and well written. I'd recommend checking this one out of the library, (cause I rarely buy books), but it's probably not one I'll read again. Then again, I might. They were really cute. Just enough to stifle my fiction reading urge so I could get some more schoolwork done!

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

What we didn't find when we went camping last week

2011-07-12T23:05:00.000-04:00

We went camping over the weekend. A few friends were supposed to go with us, but everyone ended up sick or not able to make it. We did, too. Sick that is.

We arrived in Brookville at about 11:00pm and decided that we just weren't up to pitching a tent in the dark at midnight. So we found a motel. A cute little family owned one. And it was clean, so I was happy. Seriously hate dirty hotel bathrooms. Justin's belly wasn't up to par so he appreciated the clean bathrooms and I was feeling.....ahem. Yeah. I was feeling moody. We'll leave it at that.

The main reason I was excited to go camping this weekend was that we had found LOADS of wild, obviously organic, raspberries last time we were there. I had visions of picking at the bare minimum a cup and eating some more whilst around a fire. Twas not to be. We drove all over yonder and back in Justin's 2-door Dodge Stratus (not recommended for car health) and only found ONE bush with ANY ripe raspberries.

4 to be exact.
4 ripe raspberries.

Justin ate two and I took a picture of my two before I ate them. Here they are.

Yummy, but only four?? Sad. Maybe next time. Wanna come?

How Does My Garden Grow?

2011-07-08T17:25:00.002-04:00

We are going camping in a few hours.

I've been grocery shopping and cooking all day!

I made Justin 24 breakfast burritos that he can heat up to eat before work.

They have eggs, green peppers, onions and cheese.

Healthy and yummy!

My plants have grown since the last time I showed you all pictures!

The one tomato plant that has grown amazingly.

Our rabbit and then the groundhog ate off a bunch of leaves,

so we moved it to the porch.

2 green pepper plants that are growing well.

The other two green pepper plants.

The green pepper bug. See it?

There's lots of little buds....where are my peppers??

Seriously, when do these things give me peppers?

I just have leaves right now.

Green pepper in front that has a larger pot, but isn't as big.

Tomato behind it that's being poky and little.

We used to have a plug for a lamp post there that we don't own.

So, I took out all the rocks, covered the plug and then tilled it up!

In there starting at 3 o'clock are chives, tomato, lavender,
tomato, mint, basil, basil and a green pepper!

There is spearmint and oregano trying to grow in the pots in the middle.

We'll see.

See this sweet lil' tomato plant? That's right. You don't. The groundhog ate it.

This tomatoe plant is in the same exact pot and soil as the other,
but is only a fraction of the size. Why??

They've been right next to each other in the same sunlight for weeks now.

See all my bean and pea plants?? Right. Groundhog ate those. He will be shot.

Really, he will be. We look for him every night with the gun ready.

And two other little tomato plants in the largest containers I have.

Hopefully someday, I will have actual veggies to harvest. Until then I'm stuck with the chives and basil. Not that I'm complaining, we use the chives in EVERYTHING.

YUM.

New Scissors

2011-07-03T22:05:00.002-04:00

Justin a wonderful husband. I am realizing this more and more every day. I am blessed.

Today we went to see Justin's Pap. Just so happens JoAnn Fabric is right next door! (Ekk!) I asked to walk through since JoAnn's is about a 35 minute drive from our house and I never get to just "walk around". Justin obliged and followed me patiently through the store.

They are having lots of sales. My husband took one look at all the sales and was like, "Do you need anything? All this stuff is way on sale." Um, sure! I stuck with a few 60% off fabrics, because this is outside of the budget until Friday.

Justin noticed some scissors that were 50% off and was like "You should get some really good ones. You are always looking for good scissors at home and you cut a lot of things." Smile. Um, sure! I've been wanting new scissors.

It may not be a lot to you, but it's a lot to me to have a husband who not just allows me my crazy hobbies, but encourages me in them. This is also the man who a few weeks ago said, "I want to buy you a new sewing machine. You sew a lot and I want to work overtime in the next few weeks so I can buy you a nice machine that will quilt and do all the things you wish yours did."

Ahh. It took some convincing, but I took him up on the offer. Now, to research machines that do what I want. What do I want??

Photo Credit to J.Ann Kramer Photography, taken at Nick and Heidi Poole's wedding in their awesome photobooth!

Book Review: The Final Summit

2011-07-02T21:39:00.000-04:00

Ok, I really couldn't pass up a chance to get and read a Christian fiction eBook for free! I belong to a review site called BookSneeze where they give me free books and I write reviews. Love it. You get to choose what books you want to review and last night I picked The Final Summit by Andy Andrews in eBook form. (Quick gratification...I got to download it thirty seconds later.) Yes, last night. I read it....and finished it a few hours later. I was really in the mood for some good fiction and this was a good choice!

This book focuses around the main character David. David is a Traveler. That is, someone whom God has allowed to travel back through time and meet certain historical characters to learn from them. The Final Summit is the second book that David appears in. The first book details his journey back through time. This book details what happens when God calls an assembly of all the Travelers that ever were throughout history. Their task? Figure out why the present civilization is headed for destruction and what they can do to get back on the right path. David has been appointed to lead the assembly in search for the answer. The twist? They only have a limited amount of time and guesses to get it right. Get it wrong and civilization will continue on it's path to destruction and death.

I really liked this book. It has a simple but intellectually complex plot line with some amazing nuggets of wisdom in it. The book reads well, is easy to follow and you can get through it fairly quickly. It wasn't the most exciting book, but this isn't the kind of book you read for the action. This is a kind of book you read for the message. There were some amazing quotes, ideas and general points about life. It was challenging and inspiring. There are several places that I have underlined. Overall, this isn't a book that changed my life and I wouldn't necessarily go out and buy it (I hardly buy any books....only the amazing ones.), but I would reread it again and recommend it to others. It's just a good message, one everyone should hear.

P.S. - This isn't a book you read for the theology, either. Actually, don't even pay attention to the theology. It's a book, truly a fictional story to illustrate a few poignant points. Don't nitpick. Go with it.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Update on my Head

2011-07-02T13:45:00.001-04:00

So, since the 10 day tortilla chip migraine went away, I've actually been doing pretty well! I've had a few days of tense-ness and some days where I have about a 3-5 out of 10 headache, but no nausea and no wanting to bang my head against the wall! Whooo!

I did experiment with bananas this week. For the past few days, I've eaten one or three slices of dried banana chips (made by me!) every day. That small amount doesn't seem to bother me. Yesterday, I ate a large handful and chomped on a few raw bits as I was putting more in the dehydrator to dry out.

This morning I woke up (about twelve hours after consumption) and I had a good ole' migraine. It went away with two Aleve and one Imitrex. Improvement! And, I might be able to loosen my banana policy. Ok here and there, but no large quantities. Love it.

A Dress Shirt Skirt!

2011-07-01T13:34:00.001-04:00

I saw this picture on Grosgrain probably a year or more ago and I loved it. I loved it even more when a few weeks later Justin handed me a navy blue with white pin stripe dress shirt and said, "It's ripped. Wanna throw it out?" NO! It was ripped right along the buttons and really, I couldn't have fixed it for him to wear again. But, this picture flashed through my mind and I tucked it into my closet. It sat there for over a year. Then, one day, I felt like making it. So, I did! No rhyme or reason or pattern, just thought about it and started cutting and sewing.

Here is the short version of what I did:

1. Ironed - a lot.
2. Held it up to my waist and decided where to cut it off so I'd have a decent length skirt. I cut it off at the armpits. (If I did it again, I'd cut off right below the collar and then cut off the sleeves at the sleeve seam. You'd have to sew two new side seams to close up the armholes, but it's be worth it for the extra five inches of length.)
3. I turned under twice and then hemmed the top of the skirt, which was the raw edge that I just cut off.
4. I pinned and sewed shut the shirt along the center, where all the buttons are. Left the buttons intact. Stitched in the ditch for this.
5. I shirred the top with elastic thread with 12 rows of shirring.

6. Laid the sleeves out and cut them down so they were only as wide as the cuff at the end of the sleeve. Sewed each sleeve together again and then pinned and sewed the sleeve together in the middle to create one long tube. That's my belt!
7. Sewed 4 belt loops from left over sleeve fabric.
8. Sewed belt loops onto skirt
9. Threaded belt through and pranced around the house saying, "I sewed a skirt and it worked!"

Yes, I was excited.

Then, I made Justin take a bunch of pictures. I love it. SO comfy. A little short for me, which makes it took a little poofy at the waist, but really cute overall! Next time I'll try to get an extra 3-5 inches out of the shirt before I cut!

Whaddya think?

Book Reivew: Lets Do Lunch!

2011-07-01T12:58:00.001-04:00

I belong to a program run by a publisher in which they send me advance reader copies or a free book and I read it and give my honest review on my blog. I love reading and I love free books and it's a Christian publisher, so I do it! See the disclaimer at the bottom of this review. Also, I've had this book for almost a year and it's high time I published my review. UGH! Procrastination. Here goes!

I recently read the book "Lets Do Lunch" by Roger Wilson. Well, not recently. Probably about a few months ago. I liked it, but it took months to put it into practice, and I did it without realizing I was using his principles. The reason is, as a registered nurse, I know this diet works, but I think it leaves out a few key nutrients that I don't think are as fattening as the author thinks.

Let me give you an overview. Roger was very overweight, had comfort foods, wasn't a good exerciser, but felt the need to lose weight. Over a series of discoveries, Roger found that some foods were less fattening and others were more fattening. He began a "program" that on which he ate all the less fattening or non-fattening foods that he wanted while limiting or cutting out the more fattening foods. That's basically it! He didn't portion control or starve himself and if he had a craving that he HAD to have, he chose the least fattening version of it and ate just enough to curb the craving. Over time the cravings ceased and he learned a new way to to eat. In this book, Roger shares all the upswings and downfalls of his journey in an easy to read, conversational, funny manner. It truly was an easy book to read and follow. He provides meal ideas, meal plans and recipes that are all "safe" on this plan.

I decided to read this book because I was trying to learn more about foods. In the past eight months I've done a ton more research and while I think this book makes several very good points and that you'd lose weight if you followed this, I don't agree with a few points. Roger has you cut out mostly all dairy. He does eat a limited amount of a few cheeses, low-fat milk in some drinks, etc. You can't have candy and only limited amounts of sugar. You also have to trade out carbs (including bread, pasta, potatoes & rice) for beans, corn products and peas. This was really hard for me to swallow. All the things I love, I can't have on this diet. Now, I realize, since it seemed so hard for me, I should have made one change at a time and then when I liked that change, moved onto the next one.

Recently, due to medical reasons, I've cut out all gluten, sugar in any form, and most corn products. I eat raw whole milk from a local farm, pastured-cow butter and tons of eggs, fruits, veggies, beans, raw honey, raw cheeses, small portions of local meats and I eat at much as I want whenever I want. I've lost ten pounds (I'm a lightweight to begin with!) and my medical problems have improved. And, over time, the cravings and my want for food have decreased. I'm not controlled by my cravings over time! Just a note: These changes were REALLY hard to do. There were tears, frustrations and cheating along the way. HARD.

So, yes, Roger was right, I just had a hard time following the "program" the way he prescribed. As you see, I didn't cut out dairy, cheeses, oils or butters and I inhale rice, but it works for me! Overall, the concepts in this book are excellent. I recommend it! Just don't get overwhelmed. It is possible. And please drink milk and eat dairy products if you are getting them raw from a local farm. They are good for you!

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Change in Plans

2011-06-17T15:06:00.001-04:00

Well, the neurologist had given me a script for methergine to break the migraine. Yup. If you read the link, its used to stop uterine bleeding after a birth. Oddly enough, it helps heads, too. Love off-label uses of meds.

Anyway, been taking this for two days and not liking it. Crampy/sharp abdominal pain, heart palpitations/fast heart rate, hard to remember when I took the last dose, need to take it three times per day and oh yeah, my head still hurts and I'm still nauseous. Add onto that the events of last night which included not sleeping. At all. Not one wink. Up and down all night, tears, frustration, resignation, etc. All there. Sleep? Not happening. After 26 hours of being awake, I was able to fall asleep for about three and a half hours. And yup. Now I can't fall back asleep. Grr. Still exhausted, but feeling much more rational now.

I never have this problem. I am the girl who can sleep anywhere, anytime for any length of time. You name the length, I'll sleep it. Put me in a car? Sorry, you wanted to talk?? So sleepy..... The women in my family have a unique ability to SLEEP. We all to go to bed at midnight? Usually ten am, the first one rolls out of bed and goes and pokes the other one who groans and rolls back over. Yeah. We're good sleepers.

Anywhoo. Not sleeping is not normal for me and the only different thing I have done different in the last two days is the methergine. Took the first dose Tuesday night and didn't sleep well, very restless. By the time I had five doses in, wasn't sleeping at all. Plus, I always get the odd side effect from meds and this felt like a med reaction.

Had anxiety in the middle of the night about how this was going to affect my head. Remember? Solid sleeping schedule = less headache? Wondered what not sleeping will do to the headache. For the record, it's not much worse.

BUT, still nauseous, light sensitive, pony tail sensitive and with pain. Now with abdominal cramps. And heart palpitations. Yay.

So called the neurologist. He said to stop the methergine. Check, did that about five hours ago. And go pick up some steriods. Check, asked hubby to stop and pick up on the way home from work.

Le sigh.
Drama.

(At least I did Wal-Mart today and was too blurry to feel too nauseous with all the bright lights and such. Yay for shopping, boo for driving so tired.)

Whats Been Up

2011-06-17T00:52:00.001-04:00

I had a rough two weeks about ten days ago. I had multiple headaches and I couldn't pin down what it was that was causing them and I was frustrated.

Then I had a great week or so. No headaches, just a mild tension that I could feel all around my head, but no pain or nausea.

Then I ate some MSG in some tortilla chips. On accident. Just careless. I didn't read the ingredients, just grabbed a brand that had been ok for me before, but it was a different flavor. I ate about 3-4 handfuls of them that night at dinner. I thought everything on the dinner table that night was "safe", so I "splurged" a bit and ate two large spoonfuls of Giant Eagle macaroni salad and half a slice of apple pie. All three together equaled a headache that started in intensity on Saturday and lasted until today and it hasn't gone all the way away just yet.

The sad part is, my friend Heather looked at me over apple pie and asked if I was going to be ok eating all of that. She didn't want me to get a headache. I felt confident when I said, yes. (I have great friends.) I'll be more careful from now on, Heather. :)

Symptoms have included sharp pain over my right eyebrow, tension like I'm being squished in a vise between my temples, achy pain over my left eyebrow, blurry vision, nausea with movement, light, walking and some loud noises. I had a fast pounding heart rate with dizziness over days 3 to 5. I believe it was from so many doses of Imitrex. I had taken 5 doses in the first three days, all of which is perfectly reasonable. (That means I didn't take too many. I was taking it as prescribed.)

I took Aleve twice daily for days 1 to 3 when I figured it wasn't working, so I should stop irritating my stomach. Cause it works faster if you take it on an empty belly. And it creates holes in your stomach eventually when you take it on an empty belly. I've thrown up in my mouth, which is more than I've had happen with the nausea in many, many years. My ears also ring constantly when I have a migraine. The more my head hurts, the louder they ring. Doesn't really bother me, just think it's interesting. I also bump into stuff more and drop things more when my head hurts. Sometimes I have trouble remembering words or stringing words into a sentence quickly. This happens to me normally, its just much more pronounced when my head hurts.

I worked Monday with a migraine, again. I had migraine pain on Saturday and Sunday that was relieved with Aleve and Imitrex. The pain was at about a 5-7 out of 10, but I was controlling the nausea and light/sound sensitivities with Imitrex and Aleve. I took more meds and went to bed when I got home from work. I woke up at 3:30am and my head was pounding. I should have called off then, but I fell back asleep. Woke up, went to work and stayed about an hour, until my head was pounding so bad and I felt so nauseous I had my head on my med cart and had tears in my eyes. More from frustration than pain. Luckily, another woman I work with volunteered to come in and relieve me and the charge nurse for that day watched my kids until the other woman got there. I was at about an 8 or 9, 10 by the time I got home.

Thank you Janine and Monique. You have no idea.

I went home, curled up into a ball with the covers all up around my head, slept for five hours, got up, laid on the couch, then slept all night. Kept down some food. Pretty much been laying around since then. I gave myself until Wednesday at 2pm to feel better before I called the neurologist and asked for meds to break the migraine. When it's been longer than three days and six consecutive doses of Imitrex, you can call in and they'll call you in a script. I agonized over that phone call. I didn't want steroids. No worries, they called me in something else. I am to take it three times per day for seven days. I've taken five doses thus far. It makes it better for about four to five hours after the pill, then it comes back and I take another pill.

I hate pills. But the relief is immense. I was able to unload and load the dishwasher today. Yesterday all that moving was too much. I did go to Target to get meds and walk around and the Goodwill to walk around. I didn't realize how nauseous I was and how much the light/sounds bothered me till I went to Target. I had to breathe deeply the entire time I was there to keep from throwing up. But I walked around anyway. Just needed to get out of the house and feel normal. Then I went home and laid down for a good while til the world stopped hurting.

As long as I stay in my house, curtains draw, don't move much and go slow, I don't hurt that bad and I don't feel that nauseous. Go outside, see fast movement, sunlight, etc and it's all over. But in my house, no problem. I actually don't feel all that bad. I just have to lay down every hour or two. Not bad.

Tonight I have a sharp pain over my right eyebrow and it won't go away. The pain was so sharp I actually grabbed my head at one point. Odd. I don't usually have sharp pains and I don't usually let on externally how bad I am hurting. I think, at least. My back flank area aches, like it always does when I have lots of meds in my system. I've had sharp stomach pains today, too. Who knows why. But I've been able to sew. Amazingly, it had not hurt my head more to sew or read on the computer or watch movies. Which is awesome. Laying on the couch in the dark in pain is boring. Movies make it seem like a pretend vacation from reality as well as playing with my fabric.

I watched some good stuff and some stupid stuff. Some stuff I turned off five minutes in for lewdness. Seriously people. Not necessary. I even cooked and ate real food for dinner. Veggies and rice. YUM. But I have not yet washed dishes. Yuck.

I don't know why I wrote all this stuff. Probably so I'll remember. Because one day, I'm not going to have headache anymore. I keep reminding myself that getting off meds is worth it.

By the way, I took my last dose of imipramine Tuesday night. I'm off it. Which is probably why this headache is taking so long to go away. But it's worth it. I still haven't tried everything I know of to try to get rid of the migraines. There are more dietary changes I can make, supplements I can start, a nutritionist and a naturopathic doctor I can go see. I will try everything I know of before I go back on daily meds again. Even if it sounds crazy, I'll do it.

At this point, I would prefer to shoot myself in the foot than to go back on daily meds. My only option at this point if I go back on meds again is Prozac. Don't even get me started. I hate SSRI's like you wouldn't believe. I hate the side effects, I hate how I feel, I hate it all.

There's lots more things to try. Something will fix me. I just have to find it.

P.S. - the diet is working. It might not sound like it, but I tried for a year to get off imipramine and couldn't even get lower than 18mg without intense headaches. This current migraine occurred because I messed up on the diet and ate a "not-safe" food. I was doing great on 12mg of imipramine for the entire week before the migraine. So yes, I'm staying on the diet. I don't even mind it much at this point. I found a way to make "safe" chocolate. I'm happy food wise. And ten pounds lighter.

Eating Real Food on a Budget

2011-06-04T10:56:00.006-04:00

Eating real food means that I have to follow a budget. It's more expensive in some ways, but cheaper in others.

Organic and whole foods can cost more.
BUT I'm not buying anything I can make myself or snack/processed foods.

Ta-da! More expensive, but buying fewer items, so it should equal out, right? Right.

Unless you are me and go to Trader Joe's for the first time, get excited about all the food you can actually eat there and buy a ton of splurge items. I spent way too much money at Trader Joe's and blew up my food budget.

I cried.
Yes, I cried.
A couple times.

I have been trying really hard to stick to our processed food budget and it's been working, until now. It made me upset that I had such weak willpower and went over so much. So not me.

Luckily, my loving and forgiving husband has been working overtime and covered it for me.

I cried again when I told him. AND, I just did the numbers and realized the total I told him I went over was a low estimate.
Poo.

I'll have to tell him the real estimate in the morning.
Double poo.

So, to understand what happened, I went over each receipt from all six stores I went to.
AND after about an hour of computing and circling things on receipts that were splurges......

I feel better.

My meal plan would have fit into my budget if I hadn't gone over and splurged and if I hadn't needed to stock up.

Yes, I'm crazy and anal to spend an hour and break all this down, but its necessary.
I need to be able to do this on a real budget.
It's important to me.
Thanks for listening.

Stayed Up Too Late

2011-06-03T21:44:00.000-04:00

I had an awesome blog planned that would tell you how much freezer cooking and such I did over the last two days. So awesome. And yummy. I even had pictures. Well, I still have them.

Buuuuuut. I stayed up too late looking at thing in my Google Reader and Pinterest.
Whooops!

Maybe another day. Work tomorrow.
Shower and sleep now.

Night!

P.S. -NO MIGRAINE TODAY!!!! YAY! Days like today make me feel like everything I am changing and modifying makes a difference. Yes. Days like today get me through days like the last 5, all of which had migraines in them. You win some, you lose some. Today, I won. Hallelujah! Psalm 21.

Sugar is Evil

2011-06-02T22:26:00.001-04:00

You all knew this. I was living in denial.

I have "cheated" a few times while on this crazy little diet of mine and both times it's been with sugar.

{Let me clarify here. Sugar = refined white sugar}

Both times have ended with migraines started as soon as five hours after eating the offending item and lasting as long as thirty hours.

Poo.

Bad news. Sugar gives me migraines.
Sad day. I love sugar.
Good news. There are lots of alternatives to sugar.

Honey.
Pure Maple Syrup.
Pure Cane Sugar Crystals (in limited quantities).
EAT SALT.

That last one is my little experiment. When I have a sugar craving, I try to eat something yummy and salty instead. Like all natural peanut butter or all natural corn chips that I can eat. It's going ok. Eating less sugar, so something must be working!

There are more. I just don't use them as of yet.

I <3 honey and pure maple syrup.

(Lazy) Two-Week Meal Plan

2011-06-02T22:18:00.002-04:00

This is a lazy meal plan.....or perhaps I will just call it a flexible meal plan. Since I've been eating real food that I actually have to cook and because I hate food-type stores, I now realize the need to meal plan. So, I list out a bunch of meals that I will cook with some sides and then a few desserts, go shopping all at once, cook in large batches, freeze some, eat some and then we are done! Whew. Oh, I list breakfast items, too.

Breakfast items get their own category, because I love breakfast. Favorite meal of the day. YUM.

Two Week Meal Plan - May 27 to June 9th

Main Dishes

Lemon Garlic Drumsticks
Eggplant Torta (sorta like lasagna I think!)
Cucumber Soup
Apple Bacon Tomato Soup
Tortilla Wraps
Chicken & Fruit Salad
Marinated Chicken dish
Ahi Tuni Steaks with Coconut Lime Cous Cous

Sides

Squash/Onion/Zucchini sauteed up in EVOO
Side Salads
Hummus - 3 different kinds cause I'm making a lot!

Breakfast

Eggs - any new way I can think of!
Hot Wheat Cereal
Gluten Free Apple Pancakes (although I'm sorta sick of these)
Bean/Deer/Tomato Quiche
Bean Apple Cinnamon Muffins
Overnight Oatmeal (maybe....can't decide if its important to stay away from oats)

Desserts

Yogurt with Fruit (If my new yogurt starter ever comes)
Baked Custard
Flourless Cocoa Cake
Organic Strawberry Smoothies

So there you have it! Some of the recipes I am altering to make them more nutritious, or just plain ok for me to eat right now. For all the main dishes, I just make the recipe and it's usually enough to feed me and Justin for one meal plus have one to two leftover dishes to pack up for work or lunches. Some recipes I am striving to make two of so I can have a freezer meal when I don't feel like cooking. Like today when I made Cucumber Soup, I made a triple batch because cukes were on sale when I went shopping so I got 6, instead of the two the recipe called for!

I'm getting used to cooking smarter, not more. AND cleaning smarter, not more or harder. Right now, I have three types of beans soaking on my counter. Tomorrow I shall cook three pots of beans for a long time, use some beans right away in recipes and freeze the rest to have instant "canned" beans when I need them. Using dry beans is MUCH cheaper than buying in the can. Plus safer.

Ok, longest post ever. Sorry! Bye!

Yogurt and Things

2011-05-25T09:14:00.000-04:00

I killed my first batch of yogurt. I actually killed it while re-hydrating the starter. Special, huh? Apparently, they aren't kidding then they say that your mesophilic yogurt will die if you let it get above 78 degrees F on your counter. It's true. Mine turned into curds and whey, not yogurt. (Although it was in my oven with the oven light turned on. Dang thing got to like 84 degrees in there! Crazy!!)

Sad day.

So, I have the second half of my starter re-hydrating on top of the fridge. When I woke up at 7:45 this morning, my little thermometer said it was 70 degrees in my kitchen. Hopefully it didn't get too cold there last night. Hoping that the heat from the fridge keeps it warm, but not too warm!

Sigh. Counter-top yogurt might be harder than I thought if my counter tops won't cooperate by being a steady temperature.

Gluten Free Waffles

2011-05-20T16:20:00.005-04:00

I made some gluten free waffles the other day,

because I was dying for some oatmeal, pancakes, gluten, --something.

I used the recipe on the back of the Shiloh Farms Tapioca Flour. I didn't really read the directions about mixing the dry, then the wet, whipping the egg whites.

Yeah.

I just plopped it all in a bowl and stirred.

I was afraid they wouldn't turn out because of my lack of direction-following, but they did!

See? Crispy golden yumminess.

They taste a little eggy and are a bit chewy, but not bad. It's a good taste for sure.

If you are wondering about the odd shape, that's because I didn't use a waffle maker. I used a sandwich maker. Works just as well as a waffle maker 'cept without the cute little boxes.

The recipe made a TON, which is cool cause I froze them and have been eating one or two toasted as snacks with butter and cinnamon! Double yum.

Going Crazy

2011-05-19T21:41:00.000-04:00

I am going slightly crazy tonight.

I want a hot fudge sundae. With oreos. I don't care if it's an all-natural raw milk ice cream with dark chocolate made with coconut oil fudge or even homemade soaked chocolate cookies-- I WANT SOME.

Sigh.

I am experiencing food fatigue, I think.

It's not because I'm on a "healthy" diet or even a "no-MSG-diet". It's because I'm on this really strict diet for a while here.

I have found healthy options to make chocolate, chocolate fudge, ice cream, peanut butter. All my comfort foods. You name it! There are healthy options out there for splurge items as long as you eat in moderation. Right now I am in a stage where I have total denial of homey, comfort foods that I like.

I just feel tired tonight. Tired of this stupid diet. Tired of these stupid headaches.

I made pumpkin bread. It tastes like sorgham flour and rice flour and it made me want to barf. I can smell it in my house and I want to barf.

I'm eating my third bowl of rice today because nothing else sounds appetizing. Cereal would be nice. Oatmeal would be nice. Cheese on things again without worrying about color additives. Chocolate. Cookies. Cake. Tea. Coffee.

Sigh.
Two more weeks left, right??

My Life in Pictures

2011-05-19T17:22:00.001-04:00

I got a starter for water kefir in the mail last week. I quickly set the kefir grains to re-hydrating.

(Because they came in the mail dehydrated for better shipping)

There they are, re-hydrating. Just chillin' in some sugar water.

The water is tan/yellow-y because I used organic cane sugar, which is brown.

Sunday was a hectic day. We grabbed some produce from a local farm store and I spent four hours in the kitchen washing it all, chopping it, prepping it to be eaten and cooking meals for work the next two days.

Up above you see some apples and turnips with their tops chopped off soaking in soapy water. They soaked there while I did ten billion other things before getting back to scrubbing them.

I made yellow split pea Dahl and Jeera rice and a gluten-free rhubarb/apple crisp with a biscuit top. I also made a brown rice/tomato/onion/eggplant casserole to put in the freezer for a quick freezer meal.

I LOVE this new eggplant casserole.

Did you know you needed to let eggplant sit with salt on top for an hour before cooking it to let all the bitter juice drain off? I didn't either! Makes a WORLD of difference.

These little turnip guys are pretty, huh? Hope they are tasty!

This is the water kefir I have brewing right now. It's living life in my turned off oven with the oven light on. Makes it nice and warm in there. Perfect for all that probiotic goodness to grow!

I am hoping to make lime-aid with it when it's done.

Should be done soon. It was too sugary early today, so I'm letting it go a bit longer.

After I get this going successfully, I am going to try to make yogurt. YUM!

I felt like crocheting, so I made some washcloths for the kitchen because I spend a lot of time there. Might as well have cute washcloths, right? I used 100% cotton from Wal-mart and various different stitches. There are about four other stitches/patterns I want to try. Should have about eight washcloths when it's all said and done.

Here are the others. I think the brown in my favorite!

Hopefully they can replace our bacteria laden sponges that we've had forever.

The seedling are all doing well. We've had some major rain the last few days, so the marigolds on the right and the tomato plants in the center are looking a lil' yellow. I put them under the glass table today to let them dry out a bit. The beans and peas behind them are doing GREAT! They just keep getting taller! I think they will need to go in the ground soon.

The herbs in the tin cans never came to fruition and then the rain drowned whatever might have been thinking about growing. I'll just have to replant them!

All my chives are doing well and growing little flowers, but the basil plants from last year died. I might just cheat and buy a basil plant from the farm store. OR I might start over again with seeds. Sigh, it's just so late to try and start from seed now. Oh well. Such is gardening.

Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater

2011-05-18T15:50:00.001-04:00

I like the title of this post. I don't know why, but I do. I've had this saying floating around in my head for the last few days. I am not even sure that this is the correct form of the saying. Knowing me, it probably isn't. (I tend to make up words to things and then really think that my made up words are correct. My hubby thinks it's hilarious to listen to me sing along to the radio in the car.)

Anyway. I cheated on my diet. I went to a wedding shower for two friends and I cheated. It had been a really rough day for me. Not sure why, but I had a mini melt down for a half hour right before we went. Tears and all. Thank goodness for a forgiving, understanding husband. I apologized later, not that the apology excuses things.

Anyway. Again. I drank two cups of the punch (sprite/7UP, sherbert, canned juice, etc). You know, the really yummy kind. Probably all in all 32 oz. of punch. And I had strawberries. With melted chocolate on top. They had a miraculous chocolate fountain. Love those things. OH, also ate some fried chicken.

Hubby looked at me during my eating of this and was like, "Are you allowed to eat that stuff?" My answer? "No." And I kept eating.

That night, my belly was so bloated, it looked like I was AT LEAST 4 months pregnant. My belly gained about 3 inches around. It even felt firm when I palpated it. Yuck. I had headaches and nausea for the next two days. Wonderful!

Lesson learned.
Don't cheat.

One Day Changes Everything

2011-05-14T22:51:00.000-04:00

I received some hard-to-hear news yesterday. Nothing tragic or awful, although it felt like it at the time. I felt broken all day and was on the verge of tears. It felt like this news was going to change my entire world. I heard the news at 7:30am and by 8pm I was still tearing up while discussing it. Cried the initial cry at 7:30am and then had to go work with sick children for 12 extremely long hours. It was the longest day of my life. All I wanted to do was curl up in my bed and cry.

By the end of the day, we're talking 11pm-ish, I had gained some perspective. I was all cried out and I simply felt exhausted at that point. My husband was wonderful and I went to bed snuggling with my best friend. I felt loved.

This morning, when I woke up, amazingly, it all seemed better. It wasn't such a big deal anymore. If the worst happens from it, then it happens. It's still not as awful as I had originally thought. Even more, the worst probably won't happen. I'll probably end up with a sad but ok, medium, in the middle situation. Or Jesus could show how amazing He is and work it out so that nothing changes.

Either way, I'm glad for the perspective of an extra day on the situation. Everything always looks and sounds so much better after you've slept, rested, showered and eaten.

Sorry to be vague. While this is something that is affecting my life in a big way right now, it's not something I can share right now. I would appreciate your prayers. And don't worry, all is well with us in the big picture. It's just the details that get hairy now and then.

My Mom Lives in Kentucky

2011-05-12T11:14:00.001-04:00

My mom lives in Kentucky as about five weeks ago. She got a job at Fruit of the Loom (yes, the underwear people) programming things for them. Cause she's a computer programmer and such.

I and my sister missed her so we drove down to see her new place, boxes and all. What I mean by that is Justin drove and Nichole and I slept.

We timed it so we could attend Destiny Church's worship night with the Davis' and Bethany. Amazing stuff. I love these people and it was SO good to hug them.

We then drove into the middle of nowhere and there my mom's house was!

We shopped, talked, decorated and ate. Sacred, beautiful things when you do them with family.

We made silly faces.

And then we made normal faces so Justin could get a decent picture of us.

All in all, it was so worth the 20 hour round trip drive to see all those lovely people.

I even got bit by a tick. We were walking in mom's yard looking at bushes we thought were blackberries and something bites my foot! I look down, see a black sunshine looking thing, proceed to freak out, jumping up and down, swatting at my foot. I got it off, but I think it got some blood.

Love you Kentucky. (You are pretty, but you have lots of bugs!)

Love you Mom! (You are just pretty.)

Tired

2011-05-11T19:58:00.000-04:00

This was my kitchen tonight so I'd be ready to working and eat the next two days.

Broccoli, short grain brown rice, chicken with lemon and cooked apples/pears.

These days my kitchen seems like it is always dirty and I am always cooking.

OR you could look at it as I am cooking as much as a normal person now,

and cleaning as much as the kitchen should be cleaned.

Mom, Dad, you'd be so proud. My kitchen is truly clean, clean at least once per day now.

Clean like my mom used to clean the kitchen right after dinner,

so that you knew the kitchen was closed and you weren't getting anything else.

Cept I'm usually too tired after dinner, so I clean it after breakfast.

Or while it's cooking. Works for me.

Just still getting used to all of this. I LOVE the food now and I feel better.

Healthier. But right now, lots of cooking and cleaning.

Some day, when I get better at all this, it won't be so much.

HA! Who am I kidding??

Some day we'll have kids and then it will get worse!

Oh well. They're worth it.

Right?

I Have the Best Church Family EVER

2011-05-11T10:26:00.001-04:00

We are very blessed with the little church we've found here, Bible Christian Fellowship in South Butler. Its a small church plant, filled with people who love the Lord. Namely, people who love the Lord and love to have large families. Many families in our church have 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 or 9 kiddos! That was a huge pull for us when we were choosing a church, as we want to have a large family and want to learn how to raise them to love the Lord. Many of the families homeschool, which we might want to do. AND, the best part for me right now, is that many of them love gardening, canning, eating healthy and cooking with whole foods.

Amazing.

It is amazing how the Lord puts us in strategic places for just the right season in our lives. Perfect. Just when I need to learn how to cook with whole, healthy foods, the Lord puts me smack dab in the middle of ladies who know how to do that. (!!!) I am so blessed.

So, all of that leads up to what I really wanted to say. Two ladies from my church, Sally and Heather, bought me birthday gifts for my birthday two weeks ago. I told them both that they didn't need to do that, but they both did anyway! Sally bought me an amazing cookbook, Nourishing Traditions, and gave me all the her gluten-free flours/recipes that she didn't need anymore. LOTS of them. Heather put together a little cookbook of whole-food recipes and gave me a big bag full of the ingredients from Trader Joe's to make them! Made me feel really loved.

Here is my table full of all the flours, food and spices Sally and Heather gave me! I feel really blessed. Seriously, I could cry. This is amazing!

I am especially excited about the three ingredients above. Almonds, natural peanut butter and cous cous! YUM!

And lastly, the amazing Nourishing Traditions cookbook. If you look really hard, you can see all my cute little bean/pea sprouts growing and getting more leaves! Yay, grow little sprouts, grow. My tomatoes on the other hand, are so not worth photographing. In fact, I might I have killed some. I tried to revive some today, so we will see.

On my Near-Future-To-Do List

2011-05-10T23:59:00.004-04:00

- Make my own laundry detergent
- Make water kefir
- start a batch of yogurt
- learn Natural Family Planning
- Figure out how in the world I'm going to remember to take my temperature at the same time every day
- Read "Preserving Food Without Freezing or Canning" before it's due back at the library
- Buy two dozen canning jars from Nancy on Craigslist
- Finish my hexagon present for Sarah (!!) <---- super excited about this one

Thinking/Reading about:
- fermented foods
- milk kefir
- fermented canned beets
- fermented canned salsa
- canning applesauce
- canning spaghetti sauce
- compiling all my new recipes into a book
- fermented canned sauerkraut (maybe I would like it.....)
- fermented canned beet and apple relish
- fermented canned pickles
- Coconut Oil
- Cod Liver Oil
- Ghee
- Raw milk butter
- Selling all my textbooks on Amazon. Do it now, or wait until fall when most colleges start again?
- Getting someone to redesign my blog, cause I hate it. Again.

Sometimes I try to do everything I want to do all at once. Then I feel overwhelmed. Then I laugh at myself. No one is going to yell at me if I don't get everything done tomorrow. Or the day after. Or that day after that. Take it one day at a time and ENJOY IT!

Sigh.
I love learning new things and I love my life. :)

Migraine

2011-05-10T23:49:00.000-04:00

I woke up with a migraine today. I wanted to share it, because I haven't had one in five days, but also because I don't just want to share the good stuff, but the bad stuff, too.

I had increased tension when I went to bed last night, so I got up and took an Imitrex. I woke up six hours later in awful nine out of ten pain. (Sorry, I'm a nurse, I describe all pain on a pain scale, lol.) I got up, took more Imitrex and Aleve and went back to bed, even though it was eight or so already.

As I laid there, waiting to fall back asleep, I just thought, "I can't do this anymore."

I'm at that point. The point where you just can't keep doing what you are doing because it's hurting you. It was time for change and every headache I get now will remind me of why I am doing all of this. I just can't live in pain like that anymore. I can't and I won't.

I'm not surprised that this migraine cropped up. I really don't think this one had anything to do with food. I think it was more a hormonal issue as my friend came today. Migraine and my friend coming on the same day? Yup, for the last two years, that has been the pattern. I will be looking into a possible hormonal imbalance in the future, but for now, it's enough to know that this is not the diet failing me.

Good reassurance.

RAW MILK

2011-05-10T23:12:00.000-04:00

Some people think the idea of drinking raw milk is horrific, horrendous and utterly unsafe. I don't, but I'm not really interested in debating why at the moment. At the moment, I am VERY excited that I purchased today for the first time, raw milk in all its fatty goodness. (YES!) So, I thought I would show you my bounty and what my fridge is looking like these days.

Here are three half gallon glass containers of beautiful fatty whole raw milk. Tastes amazing by the way. I didn't realize I didn't know what real milk tasted like til I tasted some non-homogenized, non-pasteurized milk. Amazing. (I say that a lot.)

We've (really, I've) already eaten through a dozen and a half pastured eggs, so I bought two dozen more at the farm where I got the milk. I'll tell you more about the farm later.

I bought cheeses made from real milk as well! Cheeses I could eat. YUM!

And I think vegetables are pretty, so here is what remains of the veggies I bought last week. Broccoli, lettuce, spinach, tomato, onions and radishes. Not loving the radishes as much as I thought I would.

And here is all the food I took out of my cupboard that I can't/won't eat. Sad. But not sad for me, as all that stuff probably gives me a headache anyway. Plus, I have yummy alternatives now, so I'm not missing any of this stuff that bad. Today, at least.

Cravings

2011-05-08T21:35:00.001-04:00

I worked today and I think 50 BILLION people offered me a cupcake.

Ok.

Only one! But it was SO hard to turn it down. I was proud that I didn't have a moments hesitation. I immediately said, "Oh, no thank you. But thank you!" That's something, right?? But it did make my mouth water, just a tiny bit. Or a tiny lot. A lot.

Then one of the girls at work was eating this gorgeously large chocolate chip cookie, and some of my kids got yummy things on their tray, and I talked about pancakes with a four year old when he woke up for the day at 3pm.

(Yes, 3pm. We mess up kid's sleep schedules in the hospital...some families come to us like that, though. Anyway, back to food.)

Right now I am home from work, just ate an amazing salad and I still want sugar. I think I'll have a gluten-free apple muffin with soft butter instead....but I'm wishing for jelly inside.

Really, I think abstaining from a lot of sugar is good. I ate too much of it, really. I was and am an emotional eater. I eat just to eat and to feel thing in my mouth and belly. A full stomach is comforting to me.It's like I used chocolate like anti-depressants. Don't feel good? Get some chocolate. Hard day? Have some chocolate. I lean on food and depend on sugary food more than I would care to admit.

So, this is good for me, but it's hard.

These things I know:
- it won't always be like this
- that there WILL be an adjustment time
- anything worth doing is hard
- if this is going to help my headaches and clear the way for the Lord's will to be done in my life, much will be coming up against me. (I'm expecting it and relying fully on Jesus at this point. He protects me and sustains me, always.)

Pray for me when you think of me, please.
Pray that God would heal my headaches completely and that He would give me strength and wisdom to sustain this new diet-life-style. Amen!

First real-food-msg-free-meal!

2011-05-07T21:11:00.003-04:00

Well friends. What you have above is my first meal of my new diet, the MSG-free diet, which just happens to also be gluten-free, low sugar and mostly organic. :) That night, I had sweet potato fries lightly coated in olive oil and kosher salt, a hard boiled egg, freshly steamed broccoli and a few slices of Colby cheese, made from whole milk. It may look odd, but I've been craving those sweet potato fries for a few days! Made me excited to start this diet! There is no meat, because I forgot to defrost that morning. Uh, I'll work on that.

For breakfast, I've been doing omelettes with cheese, spinach and red bell peppers or tomatoes. YUM! Kept me full for like 5 hours! I am working on making an apple-honey brown rice with milk breakfast porridge for tomorrow. I'll let you know how that goes!

Lunch has been a hodge podge. Yesterday I made spinach-cheese-tomato-radish sandwiches with the spinach acting as the bread. Pretty good! Then, for dinner I made brown rice with sautee veggies- red bell peppers, yellow squash, onions and garlic with salt and pepper. Amazingly good. Odd, but REALLY yummy. I ate that for lunch today and will again for lunch tomorrow.

I'm not the best cook and most of what I make is really simple, but I am loving this food. Craving some gluten at times, but not bad. Also craving a bit of sugar, but again, not bad. My husband is eating Easter ham right now, and that sounds pretty good, too. BUT, I am more excited to taste the soaked brown rice coming off the stove soon! I soaked brown rice for 24 hours and then cooked it. I'm excited to see if it tastes any different. It's supposed to be good for you, so we'll see!

OH! Haven't had a migraine or a headache since I ate the last bit of pizza on Thursday. :)

The New Diet!

2011-05-06T21:35:00.000-04:00

So, a friend recommended the site www.msgmyth.com to me. I went on there and read all about MSG and how it messes with your brain/hormones/etc. I thought it might be part of my headaches. They have this "test diet" that anyone can easily do and not eat MSG. It's limited because MSG has so many names/forms that it comes in that it is overwhelming and difficult for someone to totally avoid it without some guidelines. You can find the test diet by scrolling down the sidebar on the front page and clicking on "Test Yourself".

To summarize the diet for you if you don't feel like clicking over, I will be eating ONLY these things:

1. Raw milk or low-pasturized, non-homozynized organic whole milk
2. Organic, pastured eggs
3. Whole milk Colby cheese or whole milk mozarella cheese
4. Vegetables minus carrots, potatoes and beets (as much organic as possible and washed)
5. Fresh fruit minus bananas, grapefruit, grapes and berries
6. Organic, non processed, additive and preservative free chicken, turkey and deer
7. Short grain brown rice
8. Pure cane sugar if I must use sugar
9. Pure olive oil, fresh or dried whole herbs, canning/kosher salt and I added in raw honey

They recommend following this diet for 1 week to two months to see if it helps your symptoms improve. I am going to stay on it for one month strictly. It at that point it is working, I will stay on it another month and quickly wean off the imipramine over 3-4 weeks. If it really works, I'll be mostly headache free without meds on the diet. THEN, I can add things in one by one and see how my head reacts.

Call me crazy, but I think it's worth a shot. Doesn't take much, didn't cost me much more than our usual food budget and is WAY healthier for me in the long run, so I'm not doing any harm! So far I've discovered that veggies taste amazing fresh, short grain brown rice is SO yummy and I've discovered how to make decent gluten-free apple muffins, since normal flour wasn't on the list, but brown rice is, and you can make flour with brown rice. AMAZING!

(that's my muffin up there! Looks yummy, huh? I used a recipe from The Nourishing Home on FB. She is awesome and has tons of healthy recipes in her Notes section!)

I find that I am not physically craving food, but mentally craving food. I find myself with a want to eat, but not being hungry. I think I just like putting things in my mouth. It's an emotional crutch for me. It'll be interesting to try and break through that in the next few weeks.

Tossing the Prozac

2011-04-27T13:19:00.000-04:00

I dumped my little juice concoction of Prozac last night.

I just don't think I'm that desperate yet. I think there are other options that I can try right now that will enable me to get off the imipramine completely without having to get on Prozac and then get off. I'm not worried about an accidental pregnancy, so I shouldn't be worried about getting off the imipramine.

It'll come. In its own time.

And until then, I'm reading and researching like a crazy person. I think I stumbled upon a whole natural foods MSG-free diet that I am going to try to test the theory that chemicals and processed foods with MSG is making me sick. We'll see. Still praying and reading.

I Made Bone Broth from Chicken Drumsticks!

2011-04-26T12:51:00.000-04:00

I am feeling quite happy with myself. I accomplished a lot of things on my list yesterday AND I made my very first bone broth. (!!) I love getting things on my list crossed over and I love making nutritious things for my body. Bone broth is very nutritious. My husband has always told me how good his stock from bones is, but we haven't made it since we've been married. Yesterday, I decided to give it a go since we have two packages of frozen drumsticks and Justin doesn't like drumsticks.

{If you'd like to read more about the nutritional quality of bone broth, here is a good article from the Weston A Price Foundation.}

I started with these frozen drumsticks. Don't be fooled by the "natural" stickers on them, they are probably not that natural, but it's what I had, so I used it!

I used the directions from my friend Sarah Eileen (who is wonderful and amazing!). I started out with taking all the meat off of the chicken drumsticks, as best as I could. I wasn't fanatical about it. I tried to break the bones, but I'm too weak. I threw it all in a stockpot and poured two tablespoons of white vinegar over it, again, what I had. I would prefer apple cider vinegar. Then I threw two raw diced onions and a bunch of fresh chives over it.

(My chive plants from last fall survived all winter!! I'll show you them later.)

I poured about 4 large plastic drinking cups of water over it and let it boil. After about 10-20 minutes, I tried to get off the scum, but wasn't super successful because I didn't want to remove the chives and the onions and they were in the way. I didn't worry bout it. I got some scum and that was fine with me. After boiling and taking off the scum, I let it simmer away for about 7 and a half hours. I drained off all the broth and reserved the chicken and veggies for later.

Below is what I got. It looks like a small container here, but it's actually pretty large. About 8 inches wide, 4 inches deep. YUM! It even has all sort of little pretty oils on top. Love it. I plan on cooking rice in it tonight.

And below here is all the chicken and onions/chives that I drained out of the broth. I am going to use this to make a big batch of chicken salad since Justin brought home some yummy Kaiser roll type things. (I'm not sure they are actually Kaiser rolls, but they kinda have the same shape. They might be.)

I froze the bones/fat that I used this time and I am going to put them through a second boil and get the rest of the minerals out of the bones, since they were still pretty hard. I read that most people do this, and the second broth comes out more as a clear broth, but still with all the nutrition. I'm going for it, but this time, I won't start at 4pm on the hottest day of the week. ;)

Thanks for sharing the recipe Sarah!

The Food Plan

2011-04-26T05:03:00.001-04:00

The last week or so, I've been trying to avoid foods that contain these items:

- refined sugar

- MSG

- high fructose corn syrup

- partially hydrogenated anything

So, most of everything we have in our house contains these items. Even my butter and applesauce. Stinks. BUT, I've been doing well, sticking to whole foods, natural sugars, proteins, etc. I've been cooking everyday and realizing the need for more recipes for whole foods. I know how to cook with processed, packaged foods, but I am not as good when it comes to whole, raw foods.

I will learn.

lol.

And probably have lots of funny failures in the meantime.

(I'll post them here, don't worry.)

The one thing I've noticed is that except for one or two little twinges every now and then, I am not really craving sugary sweet stuff like I used to. I actually want to eat veggies and "real" food. More than I ever have before. Perhaps not eating sugar makes you not crave sugar?

I did cave once and eat six little mini cookies. Interestingly, I noticed that I had a nice sized headache about two hours after consuming them after an entire day free of headache. Hmmm....makes you wonder. Headache wise, it's been rocky since the cookies. Nothing HUGE, but one or two sudden headaches with bouts of almost instant nausea. Yuck.

Anyway, the long term plan in my head is to use up what we have and when we buy replacements, to buy things that I can eat, so I have more options! We'll see what happens!

Honesty

2011-04-25T17:03:00.000-04:00

I had a sort of frustrating last 36 hours.

I woke up today with a headache. Had one last night. Praying about the ND with my husband, who I neglected to make part of the deciding process in the first place. (Still learning how to be a good wife...another post on this later.) I get frustrated when it seems that I'm doing everything I know how to prevent my head from hurting and it still hurts. I am pretty much taking Imitrex every day. I have a pretty good supply stocked up, but at this rate, it won't last me long enough for long term. And I hate taking it.

And I hate getting on Prozac. I hate being on meds, period.

Sigh. Ok. Done.
Just needed to get that out of my head.

Clinging to the Lord's promise of healing to me.
I believe.

New Life

2011-04-25T15:22:00.001-04:00

I find it amazing

that you can plant, in little cups full of dirt,

little seeds, add sunshine, water and warmth,

and get plants!

Little seedlings, all cute and compact.

full of potential

just growing, growing, growing. (!!)

Amazing.

I love watching my little seeds come to life.

I'm like a kid, checking them every morning to see how much they've grown!

Love it! Can't wait til they are bigger!

Neurologist Last Thursday

2011-04-21T10:00:00.001-04:00

I went to see my neurologist on Thursday. I know, I know. I am going to go see an ND and I don't think what the neurologist is saying is working anyways, why did I go see him?

I like him. He's a nice guy and smart! His philosophy of headaches and such makes sense to me. I'm a nurse and I try to be a good patient. Good patients make and come to follow up appointments. I see no reason why I can see both the neurologist and the ND and blend the two worlds together. Truthfully, I would LOVE to get off all the stuff the neurologist has me on and be able to go back and be like, "I am migraine free and med free! Thank you, but I don't need to come see you anymore!"

Yup. That would be awesome.

Anyway, this is what he said:

1. You can't have a baby on impramine, so you need to get off it. But since you can't get off it without a LOT of headaches, we are going to put you on something else that is not as bad for little babies growing inside of you. It's called Prozac. (Yippee! sarcastically I say in my mind.)
2. Because Prozac has made you have panic attacks the last time you took it, we are going to start you out at a 1/4 dose for a month, then a 1/2 dose for a month, then a 3/4 dose for a month, then full strength. Maybe then it'll help your migraines and hopefully you won't feel like you need to crawl out of your skin or vomit up all your solid organs.
3. Also, you should take folic acid since you are going off birth control and could accidentally get pregnant.

Let me say something here.

There are no accidents. When the Lord wants a baby somewhere, He puts them there. No accident. But anywhoo, we are not trying to get pregnant, but I am getting off my birth control patch as it could and does cause me headaches. Okay, back to the neurologist.

4. Take more Imitrex and less Aleve cause you don't want a hole in your stomach.
5. Exercise and come back in 6 months, off imipramine and on Prozac.

What I came home and did:
1. Upped my imipramine to 38mg ish, because I am tired of hurting and it's going to be a while til I can come off of it anyway, but I am coming off of it, so whatever.
2. Make a little cranberry and Prozac dilution (1mg/1ml) and started taking 5mg every night. Let me tell you, meds crushed in juice is AWFUL! Or at least the Prozac is, NASTY.
3. Started taking Imitrex instead of Aleve.

The Regimen

2011-04-20T10:00:00.002-04:00

I take these medications every day to prevent migraines:
50mg of imipramine once per day
300mg of Co-Enzyme Q10 once per day
500mg of Magnesium once to twice per day

I take these medications when I get a headache:
2 tabs of Aleve with 100mg of Imitrex

Diet wise I try to limit my refined sugar intake (which usually doesn't go so well), totally avoid bananas and grapefruit, which I know causes me migraines and I drink a TON of water, usually between 60 and 90oz per day.

Lifestyle wise, I work only day shift as working the swing shift causes my head to hurt pretty much all the time, I try to keep my blood sugar level by eating at reasonable times and I try to keep my sleep schedule pretty constant. Which means that I try to be in bed between 10pm and midnight and try to get up between 6am and 9am. That doesn't always happen, but I try. AND, I think a lot about exercising, because that's supposed to help. Sometimes I do exercise for a few days, but that never lasts long, unfortunately.

This doesn't sound like much, but it feels like a lot to me. I feel really restricted in my life right now because of all the contraints I try and live between just so I don't get a migraine. Half the time I feel like none of this works anyways.

Well, that's not completely honest. When I am on the full strength imipramine and I am in bed on time and wake up on time and such, my migraines are pretty controlled. That means I am only have 12-15 days of mild headache a month. It also means that I am not having to use a lot of Imitrex (zero to one tabs/month) and I am also not downing an entire bottle of Aleve in one month (which happens sometimes - I am surprised I don't have a hole in my stomach).

The really frustrating thing is when I've missed out on doing something fun because I'm trying to prevent a migraine and then I wake up with one anyway. Oooooh. Those days just make me want to SCREAM and cry all at the same time.

I can't do this anymore, I don't WANT to do this anymore, I want out.
There has to be something better than the medication schedule I am doing, which is why I'm going to see an ND, researching better dietary choices and looking up chemical sensitivities. I want anything that might be causing me pain out of my life....except chocolate.

I have no idea how I am going to handle not eating that anymore.
(lots of additives, refined sugar, etc. All things which might be causing me pain!)

Missing Work, Sleeping a lot and Steroids

2011-04-19T18:31:00.003-04:00

I've had five straight days of migraine since my appointment and have taken the max amount of Imitrex I'm allowed and Aleve isn't working. I had to call off work today because walking makes me feel like I am going to VOMIT and my head feels like it is in a vice. (I DETEST calling off of work. I feel guilty, even when I am feeling awful and know going in that I won't make it. 12 hours of beeping and crying, just thinking about it when I hurt this bad makes me feel like vomiting.) I slept most of the morning til the pharmacy opened up, which also makes me feel yucky.

SO, because it's been more than three days using Imitrex with no relief, I called the neurologist's office and they called me in a Medrol pack. Steroids. Which will break the cycle of migraines and give me a clean slate supposedly. Sigh. HATE steroids, as its just more meds and crap in my system, but I must admit, it's already working. The nausea has gone away and the vice is lessening.

Going to attempt work Wednesday and pray I'm ok. Not working again after that til Saturday and Sunday.

The Migraine Story - Part NOW

2011-04-19T18:04:00.001-04:00

So, I haven't made much progress beyond coming to a decision about seeing this woman naturopathic doctor (ND) here. It took me a few weeks to come to the conclusion that I was going to go see her. Several people from my church recommended an ND much closer to me, who is a guy. I went to his website and I just didn't have peace about it. Yet, it made SO much more logical sense. He is MUCH closer, prices are just as reasonable, but it didn't feel right. Call me crazy, but I can't do something when it doesn't feel right.

It's the same reason that I haven't bought an iPhone, yet. I want to, but it doesn't feel right. (That's another whole post.)

So, after praying for a few weeks and talking to the ladies at my church again, I came to the decision to trust my gut. My gut is often the Lord trying to speak to me and I am wise to listen to it. I often don't and regret it later. I am going to make an appointment with this ND, Dr. Val as soon as we have enough money to cover the initial visit. It isn't a ton, but it's a little more than pocket change. We just have to remember to budget for it in the next pay.

Until then, I am following my regimen of meds, diet changes, lifestyle changes, water, exercise and the like. I am researching nutrition, more nutritious foods, chemical sensitivities, homeopathic medicine, dietary supplements and considering a whole bunch of things including a few drastic lifestyle changes. Most of all, I am trying not to stress myself out with all of this info. My plate is pretty full right now, but getting well so I can function well is a priority.

I am going to keep a record here of what I do now, changes I make, how I feel, what is working and what is not working. Now that you know the story you can follow along. Or not. Up to you.

The Migraine Story ~ Part Three

2011-04-17T20:04:00.001-04:00

{Ok, so when we last left off, I was bawling in Justin's lap....}

First off, let me just say what an amazing husband I have. Not only does he put up my ever constant mood swings due to pain, hormones and headaches, he goes above and beyond to help me. He's been known to rub my back, heat up hot packs, ice cool packs, find my migraine medicine and bring it to me with water, hug me, pray for me and even just help me out by doing chores, cleaning up the house, etc when I am not feeling well or up to it. I have an amazing husband and I am SO blessed by the Lord by him.

:) Okay, so back to the story.

After I finished crying that night, I felt disappointed, but more so just frustrated. I felt like I needed a new plan. I marched into my bedroom (ok, more like dragged myself into my bedroom), whipped out my cute little red netbook, opened up my Google Chrome web browser and typed into my Google homepage, "naturopathic doctors in (where I live)" Surprisingly, we have quite a bounty of naturopathic doctors here in the city.

I went down through the list and opened up pages to about a dozen practices. I started reading through them one by one, seeing what each one offered, what philosophy they followed, where they we, how much they would cost me (as this won't be covered by insurance) and the like. I found LOTS of people advertising what I call new-age crap. I don't want any new-age crap. I closed those windows and that left me with about three options.

One was VERY expensive, one was far away AND expensive and one was reasonable. The reasonable woman was a mom, a Christian, and a member of a well-known church here. Plus, she didn't sound crazy or like she used anything out of the ordinary. Her prices were very reasonable and her explanations medically sound, as far as I could tell.

The only catch was that treatment might take a while to really make a difference in my headaches. On her website she stated that it usually took three months PLUS one month for every year you've had the problem to heal the problem. In my case, that would be eight months.

I started praying about making an appointment to see this lady. I also went to the library and checked out some books on eating well, nutrition, etc so I would have some idea of what she was talking about when I went to see her.

to be continued......

The Migraine Story ~ Part Two

2011-04-16T10:00:00.001-04:00

{We left off with me hearing from the Lord to start weaning the imipramine......}

I went to Target that night, bought a pill cutter and started cutting my dosage by 6.25mg (I started at 50mg) every so many weeks. I'd wean a bit and my head would hurt for a week or two. When my head stopped hurting for a week or so straight, I'd wean again. I've had moderate success with this. I've been comfortable with the number of headaches as well as the intensity of them on a dose as low as 12mg/day and not higher than 18mg/day since July 2010. I have rough patches, but usually can get through with my rescue medications and rest.

About five weeks ago I was down to 12mg and was considering stopping the dosage completely. My head must have heard me, because I then had 21 days of straight headache followed by 2-3 days of awful migraine pain. I felt forced to go back up to 25mg to get some relief so I could work, do homework for school and basically function.

I bawled on Justin's lap that night. It felt like I was flushing 7 months worth of work down the toilet. I was completely frustrated, feeling a bit hopeless and I didn't think the neurologist would have many answers.

to be continued.....

The Migraine Story

2011-04-15T10:00:00.002-04:00

As some of you might know, (as most of you probably know) I have struggled with persistent chronic migraines for much of the past five years. I see a neurologist in the city here, who is considered one of the top headache specialists where I live. I spent the better part of three years getting control of the migraines with diet and lifestyle changes and lots of medications. For the last two years, I have been pretty happy with my migraine control.

When Justin and I married (18 months ago!) I knew that eventually I would have to stop taking the medication I take every day to prevent migraines so that we could eventually try to get pregnant. This medication is imipramine (ih-MIH-pra-mean) and I take it every night before I go to sleep. This drug causes known first trimester birth defects. Therefore, I cannot become pregnant on this medication.

I had put off weaning myself from imipramine because I did not want my head to hurt. I don't like it, at all, when I am in pain every day from headaches. I get grumpy and weepy at about day 8 or 9 of a constant headache. I started praying that I would have the strength and courage to start, but I still kept putting it off. Last May (2010) the Lord spoke to my heart and reassured me that He knew me and He knew my migraines and that it was time to start weaning.

to be continued......

A little bit of awkwardness

2011-04-14T20:20:00.001-04:00

I feel slightly awkward typing words on my blog again.
(Is it just me, or does the word "awkward" look especially weird tonight??)

I haven't typed on here since December 11, 2010. So, it's been a few months. I had stopped because there were other things that needed my attention and because we don't have the internet at my house and I felt stressed out trying to post blogs without the internet.

It was SO nice not to write my thoughts out for a while. Not to have to analyze what I was writing to make sure it was coming across the right way. Not to have to check my blog for spam comments and delete them. Not to even think about how my blog looked because no one was looking at it.

(I don't think I even paper journaled much in this time.)

::deep breath::

It was freeing. and fun.
and we've decided to actually pay for reliable internet access
(which is coming sometime between 1 and 4pm on Sunday)
SO, posting should be easier and so I might post more often.

Maybe.

I'm totally not guaranteeing that, as I am working full-time, in school full-time, a wife, in a Bible study and trying to learn how to quilt, bake bread, grow plants and can things. And sometimes I just feel lazy. And I want this to be fun for me. SO, it'll be as often as I want, when I have something to say. Which might be 4 times in one day or once a week.

We'll play it by ear and you can read if you want to or not if you don't want to.
And here's a picture of hubby and I, because I think it's cute!

Photo by J. Ann Kramer Photography at

Nick and Heidi Poole's wedding a week or so ago.

You can view the album of all the wedding guests and order prints

by going to the flickr page here:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/jakramer

Random-ness

2010-12-11T13:37:00.001-05:00

I have successfully sent out the majority of my Christmas cards. The only ones I have not sent out yet are the ones that I don't have addresses for. I have emailed everyone that I need an address for. They have not emailed me back yet, so they may not get a Christmas card. Sad day.

I have registered and PAID FOR my first semester of schooling towards my BSN. This means that not only that I am going back to school in three weeks, it means I HAVE to go back to school in three weeks. Cause I paid for it and all. Deep breath. Crazyness. I never thought I'd actually go back for my bachelors, yet here I am.

I have been thinking about baby names a lot lately. I like random names like Molly, Odette, Asher, Myra, Cora, Seraphina, Samuel, Peter, Iain, Gabriel, Gavin....yup. It's all probably because I've been reading lots of books about pregnancy and babies. No I am not pregnant, but I will be someday and I like to be prepared. Besides, this is stuff that makes me more educated for my job. I work with babies and moms and I love it.

I love it when moms and their kids at the hospital bless me. I love these kids and I got to cuddle a few of them yesterday. YAY!

I think I forgot to chart on one of my late admissions yesterday when I was at work. This is probably bad. Might have to stop by the hospital tonight and check.

I really want to bake bread from scratch with yeast. Real bread baking. I haven't had time yet, but think I might on Monday.

Going to my Dad's tonight to celebrate Christmas with him since he'll be gone over the actual holiday. Need to wrap the last few presents for that soon! Like before we leave for his house in 45 minutes.

Justin applied to CCAC yesterday, thinking about him going back to start slowly working on his bachelors, as he'll most likely need one at some point. Thinking about something in engineering, as he's such a smarty-pants and all. Seriously, he'd have to take calculus and physics and such and his brain just WORKS like that. It'd be no problem for him. Crazy-ness. Mine does not work like that.

I think that's all floating through my head right now. OH! Our tree is up, almost all my presents are bought, just have to buy one more and wrap them to put under the tree, which is up and decorated. Yay for Christmas.

the end.

Getting into the mood for babies

2010-11-28T23:59:00.001-05:00

Seeing everyone and their cute little babies on Facebook puts me in a mood to have one of my own. I lay awake at night sometimes and wonder just how she/he will look. Our first baby. I wonder and hope if they'll have Justin's lips and beautiful eyes, if they'll have my hair but his color. I wonder if they'll be cute or dorky. Either way, I know we'll love them just the same.

Getting into the mood.

It also scares the bee-jee-bers out of me. That the Lord would entrust one of His precious beautiful children to us. To raise, to love, nurture and teach all about Him. How good He is, how He loves them, the difference between right and wrong, rebellion and obedience. I want our kids to know Him and know what it feels like to be known by Him. I want them to love Him, to feel His love, grace, approval and mercy for their lives. I want them to know that they matter to Him, that they are special, just as ALL of His children are special.

And I want to cuddle them.....but maybe that's just because I'm a girl.

I'm so content and happy where we are, and honestly don't want to speed this time up for anything. I have an amazing hot husband and I'm not ready to share. But that time is coming sometime and we are preparing our hearts. Someday this family will we ready for a child and we'll welcome him/her with open arms.

Thank you Jesus.

Would you like 50 free Christmas Cards?

2010-11-27T14:30:00.002-05:00

I know I like free things, especially CUTE free things, like photo Christmas cards! This year I am using Shutterfly.com to design and print all of our Christmas cards. We've used them before and had great success! Think back to our wedding....I know, it's been a while. BUT, if you were at our wedding, you most likely signed our beautiful guest book. While the pictures were taken by our fabulous, amazing, best-friend, Mike of G and G Studio Creations, the actual guestbook was designed and printed by Shutterfly using their photo book design software online. It turned out amazing and we love that we have a keepsake now of our engagement photos and wedding day wishes from all our friends.

So, anyway, back to Christmas! This year Shutterfly has an amazing variety of Christmas designs. There is everything from photo cards, to calendars, to photo mugs, to holiday invites. Really, you could get a lot of your shopping crossed off your list here.

You can make photo cards here: http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-photo-cards
Print personalized Christmas cards here: http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/holiday-cards
Calendars here: http://www.shutterfly.com/calendars/wall-calendars
and order photo mugs here: http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-gifts/photo-mugs

Now, my big problem is that I can't decide what cards to use! I have it narrowed down to these four! Which of them do you like the best??

Ok, here's the part about the 50 free cards. If you are a blogger, Shutterfly is offering you 50 free Christmas cards of your choice. All you have to do is go to this page, read the directions, post your own blog about your favorite items on the site and you qualify for your free cards. Sounds like a deal to me! Go check them out!

YAY for Christmas.....and free cards!

SILHOUETTE MACHINE GIVEAWAY!!!!

2010-08-24T18:08:00.001-04:00

SILHOUETTE MACHINE GUEST GIVEAWAY!!!!

Please go here and check out this machine that Grosgrain is giving away! :) It's like the Cricut...but looks more awesome and MUCH less expensive upfront and in the long run.

Best of all...you can enter to win one! Have fun! :)

To-Done & To-Do!

2010-07-28T20:58:00.000-04:00

I took about five hours today and tackled some things in my sewing pile. My list of accomplishments is as follows:

4 pairs of jeans patched and re-seamed.
1 pair of khaki capri's hemmed into shorts.
1 size small (but still TOO large) long-sleeved scrub top turned into a smaller sized short sleeve top.
1 awesome artsy (way) too short dress turned into a fit-for-church dress complete with a ruffle.
Plus one other (very) money saving project. Trust me. It was good. Too easy.

Still in the sewing pile:

Two crib sheets for Machelle.
Turn Justin's old work shirt into a skirt for ME!
Fix bleach stain on favorite purple shirt....somehow.
Figure out how to finish pink shirt I dyed navy blue.
Finishing hand quilting the yellow circle quilt.
Bind yellow circle quilt.
Make ankle holster for Justin
Fix a dress I made a while back with a new tank top
Girly up an old purple scrub top
Make some cute appliques for a stained green scrub top (to cover up the stains....it's a really comfy top!)

Hmmm. I think there is more things in my To-Do pile than in my To-Done list! Oh well. Looks like I'll just have to have another sewing day. Darn!

Book Review: "Angel Song"

2010-07-24T21:22:00.003-04:00

Angel Song
by Sheila Walsh and Kathryn Cushman

Anne is a woman trying to make it all on her own in New York, New York. She is flying down to her hometown to see her sister Sarah graduate from a master's program. She's excited to see her sister, but dreading facing the town she grew up in and all the memories that comes with.

Tragically, hours after Anne arrives, Sarah is killed in a car accident. Suddenly, Anne is faced with the loss of her sister, deciding what to do with Sarah's estate, convincing her boss in NY that she is capable of landing the biggest job of her career and being confronted at every turn with a God trying to convince her of His love. Will she reject everything that Sarah lived for, including God, or will she embrace her past, forgive and accept the love of a mighty God?

Mmmm. This book is a good rainy-day-coffee-in-hand-book. I read it in 3 hours. It's not a page turner, but a predictable, easy to read, feel-good, remind you of how good God is book. You'll meet unique characters like nosy Southern neighbors, a little boy who sees angels, and a handsome contractor all with back stories of their own. Definitely worth the read if you are in the mood, but is probably a good one to pick up from your local library. I liked it, but it's not one I'll read over and over again.

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

Great Site: BookSneeze.com

2010-07-24T20:47:00.003-04:00

So, I stumbled across this great site for FREE BOOKS via a link on someone's Facebook page. It's called BookSneeze and it's a site run by Thomas Nelson, a Christian publishing house. Basically, they will send you a FREE BOOK if you will write a (very honest) review for them and post it on your blog. You can like it, love it or hate it as long as you review it after.

Did I mention the FREE BOOK?

:)

I like books.
(Actually, I am quite addicted to books.....working on that.)

I just recieved my first book from them the other day! SO exciting!! (FREE BOOK!!!!) I picked "Angel Song" by Sheila Walsh and Kathryn Cushman for my first book. It looked like a cute little fiction book and that's what I was in the mood for.

Anyway, I read the entire thing in about 2.6 hours. (Did I mention I'm a little obsessed with reading?) I'll be posting my review on it soon, so be looking for that! In the meantime, check out this site! It's a great way to get quality free books for just a little bit of your time.

Have fun!

FAIL

2010-07-20T17:19:00.000-04:00

Today, I attempted to re-do a tank top I own just like Jessica did here.

I failed.

Not because the tutorial wasn't good or because the idea is impossible. It's a good tute and the idea is awesome. I just lack the sewing coordination to pull it off. In short, knit fabrics hate me and I hate them. I spent the better part of the day trying to make this work.

It didn't.

Normally, this would really bum me out. REALLY bum me out. But you know what? This time, I just sat back with the little ugly cut up tank top in my hand and just breathed. And I sat. And breathed. And then the Lord tapped me on the shoulder.

"Good thing I didn't ask you to re-do your waredrobe for Me, huh?"

Yup. That's right. Good thing re-doing tank tops is not something He's asked of me. Making quilts so we can wrap people in His Word and Presence? Yup. That He's shown me how to do and given me the inspiration and gifts for. Tank-tops. Not so much.

So, instead of feeling like a failure, I feel like me. Right where I should be. Doing exactly what I should be doing. Making quilts and playing with horrible knit fabrics on the side. Being able to laugh at my own mistakes.

Thank you Jesus.
He is good.

Braided Ribbon Flower Necklace

2010-07-10T08:37:00.000-04:00

Ok, so this idea is not totally mine! I stole it from Jessica's tutorial at Happy Together. She called it an Anthropologiefied Flower Necklace and made her's out of leis. Her's is super cute and inspiried me to make one with things that I had!

I gathered together 6 approx 12" lengths of cream, white and black ribbon, about 5" square of black felt, some earring links, scraps of cute black fabric, random buttons, thread, needle and my glue gun.

(I must confess here....this is the first time I've ever used the glue gun since my mom gave it to me! I didn't like it....but I think I might be converting.)

I first braided 2 sets of 3 ribbons together. I then hot glued the bottom of each braid so it laid flat. I cut out a cresent shaped moon of felt and glued the flattened braids to each of the tips of the moon.

I made flowers according to this tutorial at "whatever & stuff" by Brittany. They were really easy, even though I made them inside out accidently!

I then hot glued them onto the felt, making sure it was all covered. Then I hot glued cute buttons into the center of the flowers.

All I did then was glue some earring links on as clasps at the ends, folding the ribbons edges over through the clasps so the ends looked finished.

It took two or so tried, but I finally got it all glued and pieced together well. I like it! Do you?

Thrift Store Finds!

2010-07-09T11:16:00.000-04:00

So as I've mentioned before, a new thrift store opened up in our little town here, Russellton. (I've probably spelled that wrong, just for the record.)

It's run by a local church and their pastor to fund first time medical visits for the homeless. I love the idea! Since it's the first in this small town, everyone has brought their stacks of old retro purses, dresses, trays, pictures frames and everything else to the store and donated it. Which means that other people (like me) can buy it!

Yippee!

The first time Justin and I stopped down, we spent about $5 and got a cute retro 7-piece spaghetti bowl set:

and a beautiful printed vintage knitting needle holder-bag:

(Yup, made that name up all by myself.)
I LOVE this little thing! It fits ALL my knitting needles perfectly!
And it has this lovely silky soft pink interior. No snags!

and the rosy flower printed tunic that I re-did and posted about here.

The next time I went, I took Skyla with me and found this lovely bright orange little ruffled shirt:

Believe me, it's a lot more nasty orange that it looks here. I have plans to dye it a beautiful navy blue and replace the fabric bow with a cute little yellow, red and blue ribbon. Maybe. Might just leave it as is. Haven't fully decided yet, but I will post pics when its done!

Here's to hoping I don't get dye all over the clothes I'm wearing as well as the one that I am dyeing.... (!)

Views From My Run

2010-07-07T08:00:00.008-04:00

.....except for the one photos of cute orange and yellow

teeny tiny flowers that wouldn't upload.

darn that photo!

Fabulous Frock Re-Do!

2010-07-06T11:40:00.000-04:00

YAY! That is my first response when I see all the pictures above. This is my first time taking an already-made ugly item and re-doing it to be something cute and wonderful for me!

Inspiration came from the website Grosgrain. When I saw the old frock in the thrift store, this post in particular popped into my head. I kid you not, I immediately thought, "I could do that!" AND for $1.99 I just couldn't resist buying it and trying it out!

It took about 2-3 hours since I'm not really an experienced sewer. I did sew the very first hem inside out and thus spent approx 20 minutes ripping it out (very carefully) praying that I would not ruin the beautiful paper-thin old fabric. It was a long 20 minutes, lets just put it that way.

The Main Points:

I decided that I liked the material from the wrong side better than the right side, so I decided to wear the finished project inside out.
I created new side seams to make it fit me. Probably took it in about 1.5" on either side.
I hemmed the tunic to fall to my hips, where I like all my shirts to hit.
Covered up the hole in the fabric that the button right below the neckline had created with a piece of fabric that I ironed pleats in and sewed on.
Covered the exposed seams in the shoulders with a rectangle that I ironed the ends under then sewed over the seams.
Hand stitched a rose ribbon that I had in my stash over the gathering seams on front and back.
Took the excess from hemming the tunic, wrapped it around my head and called it a headband!

All in all, it was a pretty satisfying little project. I can do this!!!
Love it.

And just for reference, the before picture:

Frock, Fabric and Just Fine

2010-07-05T01:31:00.000-04:00

Frock: I found this vintage (old) tunic at our new thrift store in town.

(BTW, it's run by a pastor who is using profit from the store

to fund their new homeless ministry.

Awesome idea and amazing little store. Has some really cute stuff.

I'll have to post later some of the other cute things we've gotten there!)

Anyway. This frock found my eye, and I fell in love.

Decided to take it home and take a stab at "re-doing" it.

Results were fabulous and I got a headband out of the deal.

I love it now and will soon post pics!

Fabric: I have fallen in love with a fabric designer named Anna Maria Horner.

I love her cute little family, her gorgeous pictures, her spirit, but most of all her fabrics!

I recently ordered a bunch in order to make a quilt of hers.

I nearly swooned when it got here. It is SO GORGEOUS!

This is just a tease. Can't wait to show you what I do with it!

(Be forewarned....it might be a while. I've got lots of projects going.)

Just Fine: My chives. I thought they were dying

and was so confused as to what was wrong.

They were not dying, they just needed thinned.

Oh and how I hated that. I just felt so bad ripping out

little baby chive plants who had done nothing more than try to grow.

So sad. But so necessary. Really. It was like magic.

I ruthlessly (not listening to their little pleads to be spared) thinned them

and overnight they blossomed into these sturdy little spikes.

So, they are not dying, they are just fine.

Of My Thoughts

2010-06-21T13:13:00.000-04:00

Lots of things running around in my head these days.

I really love my husband and even though we fight, I'm grateful that we love each other enough to think it's worth working through.

Dreaming about crafting this week as I've been working overtime at work for the past two weeks and haven't had my hands on anything crafty.

I am SUPER excited for Chris and Hannah Davis. I hate that they are moving all the way to Ketucky, but am SO glad it's in response to what the Lord has put on their hearts. I just know that Lord is going to do amazing things there! You should check out the church they will be planting, Destiny Church.

Thinking that I am in love with Anna Maria Horner's fabric line called Good Folks. Been thinking A LOT lately about making a quilt made of her fabrics....especially this zig zag one.

Going to make an apple crisp tonight. Our neighbor George gave us a whole bag full of apples. Since many of them are bruised, they will make PERFECT crisp apples.

Still working on a good way to get scripture onto the quilts the Lord has put in my heart over the last two years. Going to test out a few theories this week.

Trying to figure out a few days where we can sneak away in a few months and drive down to Kentucky so we can visit the Davis'.

And now, I'm off to fish with my husband since it is a gorgeous day out!

Preschool Sunday School

2010-05-30T22:05:00.002-04:00

I volunteer in our Preschool Room at my church, Allison Park Church on a regular basis. I've never worked with preschool age kids before outside of my job, but I must say, I absolutely love it! There is never a service when I don't walk out with a smile on my face.

You can be teaching them about how God made the world and the pretty flowers out front and no fewer than five kids will yell out "I saw a yellow flower today!" and "My mom has flowers!" and "I saw a purple flower today!". The room then quickly explodes into a discussion about what color flowers every one has or has ever had, saw or has ever seen. Umm....what were we talking about?

The cutest thing that happened today happened when I had just sat all my kids down at the table to review what we've been learning for the past few weeks. I have this hangnail on a finger on my left hand. One of my little boys Matthew noticed it as soon as we sat down. He said "Teacher, you have a boo boo!" I just said "Yup" and went on with the lesson. Then, the next thing I know, his sweet little face is kissing my boo boo!

(Ok, everyone together now...."AWWWWWW!")

He said, "There, all better!"

Have I mentioned that I love Preschool?

Running Running RUNNING!

2010-05-28T13:27:00.001-04:00

I exercised today for the first time in a month.

I have an app on my iPod called iLogger that I use to keep track of when I exercise, when I have headaches, when we do maintenance on my car, etc. When I opened it today I must say I was pretty ashamed that the last log I had for exercising was on May 1st. Ooops!

So, needless to say, today I MADE myself exercise. I must say it felt REALLY good. I had forgotten what a sweet time it is with the Lord when it's just me and Him running, thinking, praying, discussing or just enjoying Him. It's wonderful. I had also forgotten how great it feels during and afterwards.

When I run I feel powerful. Like it's ME that's in charge, NOT my body/emotion's every whim. I feel powerful and great and beautiful and awesome. Kind of like Superwoman! It's a very funny thing to me.

Here's to starting to exercise again and losing my belly full of cookies!

P.S. - the picture is from when Ann lived with me and we ran a Crafton Celebrates 4th of July 5K! I think it was back in like 2005...or 06? Or rather, back when the entryway was blue. lol.

Blog Redesign

2010-05-25T17:36:00.005-04:00

So, I promised that I'd share how I redesigned my blog without knowing HTML or PHP or CSS. I've been busy, but I finally have some time now that it's SO hot in my trailer that moving makes me sweat. I don't really like sweating. At all.

The first thing I did was search Google. I typed in all sorts of things.....but didn't get a whole lot there. It wasn't exactly what I was looking for. Most of what I found needed you to know at least SOME coding. All I can do is change a HEX color code. That's about it.

So, I starting surfing through blogs and tried clicking on names of designers and websites and I hit the jackpot!

I found Shabbyblogs.com first where they make cute free background, blog buttons, post seperaters and tags all for free! PLUS, there are step by step instructions with how to install them on your Blogger. This is a really great site, but not really my style. I kept looking.

Next I stumbled onto The Cutest Blog on the Block. Same idea as Shabby Blogs, but not to my liking either. HOWEVER, they had this fabulous section called Free Blogging Secrets where I learned how to make my own background and how to change the font on your blog posts. Using the program Paint.net along with fotoflexer.com I made sidebar tags and my own header

To change the font on my blog posts I was directed to Amanda's site. I followed her GREAT step by step instructions and was able to change the fonts. A plus is that Amanda and her husband Kevin run a free font site where I grabbed my cute font from!

Overall, it took a while. Quite a while. But now my blog is pretty and I love it! Which makes me want to blog more often.

Ugly blog? Problem solved.

Mohito Refashion Frock Tutorial and Giveaway

2010-05-24T14:52:00.001-04:00

I found the best site yesterday night. It's called Grosgrain. It's a site of a mom who taught herself to sew on a tight budget. She takes old clothes from the Goodwill, Salavation Army and such and remakes them into cute dresses! I love it!

I especially love this dress to the left of your screen:

Mohito Refashion Frock Tutorial and Giveaway

Right now you can enter to win this dress on her site! Click over and take a look!

Baby Bibs and Catfish

2010-05-13T23:10:00.001-04:00

Tonight Justin and I are out fishing hoping for catfish. They are not being coorporative. (I probably spelled that wrong...) So we are talking, waiting and now I am blogging as Justin shines his flashlight around looking for wildlife. Very relaxing and nice after today. I made baby bibs today. Lots and lots of baby bibs. About eighteen with a few precut bibs that may or maynot make it to full adult bibhood. I was pretty tired after eighteen. Oh, and one swaddle sheet.I really like making things with my hands. There is something about the process that is invigorating and bringing for me. Its so neat to go from envisioning an item, to seeing what supplies you have, to designing the heck out of it, to starting to create it, to redesigning it to fit the reality of what you can do, sweating and grunting over it for hours and then having it finally come to life under your hands. I can't help but smile. It's awesome. I love it and today was really fulfilling even if I spent it all in front of my sewing machine. I love this life, all the colors, ideas, songs and creativity God made us with. I just love that He loves it, too.

Sweet Moments

2010-05-09T20:47:00.003-04:00

There are moments in life that are just sweet. I had one of those moments today.

We took a drive today out to the Pennsylvania Grand Canyon, also called the Pine Creek Gorge. It's about a 4.5 hour drive from Pittsburgh. It's all back roads highways with cute little run-down towns in between the Allegheny Mountains for the most part. We're planning on vacationing in Wellsboro here and camping for a few days in the Grand Canyon.

In short, it's scenic and gorgeous!

So we're driving along this beautiful little highway and Justin looks over at me, out of the blue, and says, "I really love you, you know that?"

And I just smiled.

So sweet. My husband is sweet and handsome and wonderful. (And he just threw a chip at my head.....but it was only in retaliation for the chip I had thrown at his head first.)

It's nice to get away.

New Life

2010-05-04T22:05:00.002-04:00

New life beginning right on my front porch.
Isn't his little beak cute??
There are three of them in there,
and I was able to take pictures from a distance
while Mama and Daddy fed their little ones worms after a rainstorm.

Beautiful.
I love new life.

Blog Snob

2010-05-03T18:11:00.003-04:00

I think I'm a blog snob.

I haven't been writing lately on this blog. It's my fault. But I just don't want to. So I haven't. However, there are reasons to this recent decision.

The main reason is that it's just not pretty. Really, I cannot commit my writing, photos and musing to something that is ugly. I just don't want to do it. Ugly = no motivation.

Some other reasons includle:

#2 - Uploading pictures takes forever....and that's usually what I want to do.

#3 - My internet connection at home = blah. Or in other words, usually not working.

#4 - Spam. I get so much spam on this thing. Annoying.

All in all, I still write posts in my head, just have no motivation to get them up here. I am working on a solution though. I will be (I think) converting my blog to a WordPress blog here shortly. The outlay is just MUCH nicer and allows for more options in posting, ads, trackers, etc. However, this all hinges on me deciding on a theme, updating it all with my stuff and then telling you all about it.

It might take awhile.
Or in other words, don't hold your breath.

Hello there.

2010-04-14T21:23:00.002-04:00

I worked on the yard today. All day.

....Well, not all day. But it sure felt like a long time. In truth, it was about 3-4 hours. I'm not sure what time I started. BUT I was VERY productive today!!

I went to Home Depot, realized that the color mulch we originally bought, which is down in half our landscaping beds, was sold out. SO, I bought another color similar to it. 6 bags of it. I came home, spray painted primer on a PURPLE plastic planter/bench that has been an eyesore. I then spread out 3 1/2 bags of mulch on our front, very large landscaped bed. (I think this fall, I might just plant some bushes along the back and be done with half the space! It's huge!!) Then went to the landscaped bed in the back that was a wreck. Half filled with leaves, random things that fell from the deck, LOTS of earthworms, weeds and I'm supposing (hoping) some flowers. I tried to pull the weeds and keep the flowers but cleaning it out took me the better part of an hour I think! Then I had to level it. I loosened up all the top dirt with our big shovel, then got on my hands and knees and spread it all out. By then, I was pretty tired and dirty. BUT then I went and spray painted a first color coat on the plastic primer. Then I poured mulch into the newly cleaned and leveled landscape bed. I then finished spray painting the planter/bench, but it needed time to dry, so I grabbed my gramma's old gliding chair off the porch and started spray painting it, too! I got most of it, but got tired and stopped. No mind though, I will just buy two more cans of spray paint, finish painting the chair, spray paint the swing and make cushions for the chair AND the swing. It will look beautiful, I am sure! By then, the planter/bench was dry. So I shoved it back into place under our pine tree, filled the planters with dirt, planted some little Snapdragons (praying it's not too early for them to be outside!!) and took a deep breath. Sigh. THEN I cleaned the yard and decided I was done. SO, I came inside and dyed my hair and stained most of the shower wall trying to rinse it out carefully. Didn't go so well. I'll be cleaning those walls with some bleach and rubbing alcohol. I'll let you know how it goes.

I threw dinner in the oven (potatoes, flounder fillets and veggies). Don't be impressed, I shoved fish and veggies into little foil packets with seasoning and oil and let them bake at the end of the potatoes time in the oven. Very tasty. Then I finished reading a book I started to read while I was sitting on the bathroom floor, waiting until the timer went off so I could rinse my hair out. Sigh. It was a GREAT book.

It was a great day off. I am tired, sore and SO very happy that our outside is looking more and more beautiful!! I can't WAIT to get some fabric and sew new cushions. It'll look snazzy.

Ok, I am tired and should go to bed now. AFTER I fold my laundry and wash my dishes from dinner.

....totally should have waited to finish that book, but it was SO GOOD! It's always hard to put one down once you get past the mid-way point. Sigh.

Justin's 14 Layer Birthday Cake!

2010-03-16T15:57:00.003-04:00

If you cannot see the delicious cake pictures, click here.

Pictures!

2010-03-13T11:43:00.003-05:00

I've got another few posts to put up, but they all need pictures and my computer is not cooporating in loading them.

Sigh.

Maybe it's the internet that's not coorporating....
Nevertheless, I will have a talking to with it here soon and it will work!
Speaking in faith here.

Posts coming soon. Promise.

Freedom

2010-03-12T09:54:00.003-05:00

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm then and do not be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Galations 5:1

This has been running through my mind a lot lately. I'm finding freedom in my life in a bunch of small and new ways. Or perhaps just ways that I've forgotten lately and am recommitting to.

Freedom to not blog for days when I don't want to.
Freedom to try new things and not be afraid of failure.
Freedom to trust the Lord with all the little things.
Freedom to take a break when I need to.
Freedom to trust the Lord with all the big things.
Freedom not to worry.

I've been working on a yellow quilt lately. It's been fun. I've never made a quilt before. I've done some research and am now taking my first attempt at it. I love working on it, surprisingly, as I don't much really like to sew. It's not just any quilt. It's the first quilt of many that the Lord has given me ideas for and asked me to make. That makes it a slightly bigger deal. Okay, a much bigger deal to me.

I feel okay when I am working on it, but convincing myself to sit down and start working on it is hard.

Thoughts run through my head like, "I'm going to mess it up." and "What am I thinking? I can't do this." and "Oh, guess I'm not really good at this after all." All lies and we know from where. I've really been having to stand on HIS truth lately, that I am His, that He equips, that if He's called me to do it, He'll help and it will probably take some failures to get to a really well-built quilt, but that's ok. And in standing on that, I've found freedom lately. It's a beautiful thing.

The doing is always harder than the imagining.

As for new hard things, I am making Justin a double chocolate 14 layer cake today for his birthday dinner tonight from a recipe I found on Bakerella.com. Pictures will come.

Happy 6 Months

2010-03-06T17:19:00.002-05:00

It's been 6 months today since Justin and I were married.

Can you believe it? It's been half a year.

Truthfully, it just feels like we've been married forever, in a good way! I've almost forgotten what it was like to be single, to come home to an empty house, etc.

::smile::

I like being married.

Color Love

2010-03-02T13:29:00.000-05:00

Some people like the way I say color.
("keller")

I just love color.
("color")

Can you tell what I did here?

If you guessed that I organized my books based on what color the spines were, you'd be correct! I love having all the reds, yellows, blues, oranges and black and browns at the top ALL together.
Beautiful color. YAY!

We are (still) different.

2010-03-01T12:34:00.000-05:00

Case in point.

Justin's side of the bed.

My side of the bed.

Sigh. Old habits die hard.

Modesty and Swimming

2010-02-27T10:02:00.000-05:00

Swimsuits are a point of contention for me.

First of all, I hate shopping for them just as any normal woman does. They all seem too small, don't cover the important parts and they make me look pudgy. I am not pudgy. I object to little pieces of spandex and lycra making me feel inferior. I won't have it.

Second, I truly believe that as a Christian woman, there are certain things that ONLY my husband should see. This causes many shopping crisis. You see, a lot of those things are not covered by the average bathing suits available at the store. Not cool.

Thirdly, all of the bathing suits that DO cover those intimate parts are ugly. They are usually black, covered in huge tropical flower prints, with unflattering necklines and huge bunches of material around your butt in an effort to appear like a skirt. Um, I may want to be modest but I am not dead. I want to be modest AND cute! I think that is a reasonable request.

It seems that the industry has responded, at least a little bit. I am proud to announce that I have found some very reasonable, cute and modest swimsuits at Target this year. In fact, I've already bought one for myself. It's a cute polka dot black top with a halter strap and a swirly black skirt. I LOVE IT.

I thought you all might want some options this year, so I've checked out Target's site and found some cute modest suits for you!

This white and brown one piece with a skirt is cute!
I absolutely adore this bandeau one piece beauty. It comes in PLENTY of colors and is SO flattering. I loved it when I tried it on. What they don't show, is that it comes with a optional halter strap! YAY!
Paisley print one pieces are so cute.
Another great shirred bandeau option.

This page is all their tankinis. There are some GREAT options for modest coverage.
Finally, don't forget the skirts. They don't look awesome on the page, but they look SO cute on you!

Enjoy being covered and beautiful this summer!

Living Room/Kitchen Reveal

2010-02-26T16:05:00.001-05:00

I LOVE our new kitchen and living room. I just walk around and feel SO happy. Not too much to clean, purple kitchen and wedding pictures all over. I don't know what it is about this little trailer we own, but I aboslutely love it. And it looks completely different then when I first saw it last spring.

Maybe it's the fact that its our first place, that we are learning to be married within it's walls, that I can hear him from any room in the trailer, or that I can sit on the couch and stare at him making dinner (or vise versa). It's beautiful. I am completely happy in our little place. We are so blessed to have a warm solid place, with a roof over our heads, laundry capabilities, two showers, dishwasher, gas range/oven and room for an office. Thank you Jesus.

P.S. - There are a few more things we'd like to do. Like finishing painting the cabinets white and install new hardware. And stain the little table we have on the right side of the chair that you can't see in these pictures. Just a few more things. :)

Lovely Update

2010-02-26T12:00:00.000-05:00

First of all, sorry it's been so long.
The snow has not been helpful to my internet signal at my house.
At all.
In fact, it laughs in the face of my internet signal.
As in, I get no signal at all.

SO. I am in Justin's office today and will be trying to upload TONS of photos today and write all the posts that have been in my head over the past two weeks. I will try to schedule the posts to publish one day at a time so you'll have lots of fun things to read over the next few days.

I miss you all!

19 inches PLUS

2010-02-06T12:40:00.001-05:00

Living Room PREVIEW!

2010-02-05T10:15:00.004-05:00

Just a teaser.
I finally have the living room/kitchen ALL redecorated.
So, this is a preview.

I will upload MORE photos soon.
As in, after I clean up the monstrous mess.

And the flowers?

My sweet husband blesses me SO much.
Every time I look at these flowers I feel loved.
And I smile.

YELLOW!

Tall and Small

2010-02-04T23:09:00.004-05:00

Left: Justin's Dill Pickles
Right: Kristen's Sweet Gerkins

Hi again.

2010-02-01T17:41:00.002-05:00

Anyone know how it feels to have a hot cup of tea in your hands on a cold winter day? How therapeutic it is just to close your eyes, lean over the cup and let the warm steam waft by your face?

I do. And I consider it a small piece of heaven on some days. Like today.

The house is messy, we have mail that needs mailed, Christmas boxes are clogging up our living room, we JUST got out of our PJ's two hours ago, we have nothing defrosted for dinner or for lunch the next two days, wet laundry in the washer and dry laundry in the dryer, full dishwasher already filled with soap.

The house is nothing that we haven't created and are aware of. We are just not motivated today!

And on those days, at the end of them, we are usually wracked with crabbiness and guilt for having not been productive. But you know what? We've been going for a while now. Sometimes, it's ok to rest and relax. Spend time with Jesus. Read a book. Make a hair appointment. Stay in your PJ's all day. Sometimes it's good and when it's not, grace abounds.

"Who is He that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died - more than that, who was raised to life - is at the right hand of God and it also interceding for us." Romans 8:34

Stubborn Love

2010-01-21T22:33:00.001-05:00

Stubborn love walks back into the room after a fight.
Stubborn love tries to see things from the others point of view.
Stubborn love tries to understand the others point of view.
Stubborn love forgives and forgets quickly.
Stubborn love doesn't continually bring up past mistakes.
Stubborn love takes a deep breath and tries not to yell when frustrated.
Stubborn love protects and defends to others.
Stubborn love assumes the best instead of the worst.
Stubborn love gives grace again and again.
Stubborn love doesn't give up loving even when things are frustrating.
Stubborn love sees the big picture instead of just today's misunderstandings.
Stubborn love is in it for the long haul.

hmmm.
reminds me of 1 Corinthians 13.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod

Your love

2010-01-19T14:46:00.000-05:00

"Your love never fails,
The chasm's far too wide,
Never thought I'd reach the other side,
But your love never fails."

Can't get this song out of my head since Sunday.
Praise Him.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPod

Learning to Trust

2010-01-15T13:16:00.007-05:00

A few weeks ago, Justin and I had a large fight and I ended up crying on the floor in our bedroom.

[Don't be too alarmed, I always end up crying on the floor. It makes me feel dramatically justified when I sit on the floor. Makes me feel more pathetic or something, I don't know. It's a quirk. Don't you love those?]

As I was sitting there with my Kleenex, I tried to figure out why I was crying so hard. Why was I reacting so emotionally to, truthfully, a small disagreement? The truth came out when Justin and I talked a little bit later. I was trying to explain why I was so upset when flying out of my mouth came, "How many fights can we have before you don't want to come home anymore?"

Shocking, but it matched what I had said earlier in the month right before Justin's granddad's funeral, when after a fight I looked at him and said, "I just don't know what I would do if I lost you."

I was struggling with trust. It's a difficult thing, not just sometimes, but I think all the time. Especially when people you love are involved. Loving anyone requires trusting the Lord with them. It also requires learning to trust them.

The Lord has really challenged me in this recently. I realized I was carrying a lot of stress, worrying about whether Justin would come home safe, worrying that I might make him really mad and he wouldn't want to be married anymore. The Lord was calling me to lay it all down at His feet. So I started praying, I started reading Matthew 6 and I started talk to Justin about it.

Through it all, the Lord gave me peace overflowing through everything. I remembered that He is good and faithful and above ALL things. That He loves me, and that is the most important thing. He reminded me of just how faithful He's been and how trustworthy He is. Remembering all of this, I felt loved and full of His peace. I can trust Him not only with myself, but now with Justin.

As we talked, Justin reassured me. That he loves me and that he's not going anywhere. His response to my shocking statements mentioned above were perfect. He looked at me, hugged me and said, "Just because we're fighting does not mean that I don't love you. I love you. I am not going anywhere. We're going to be married for a very long time."

I think the two men in my life are amazing and so patient with me. I am so grateful for the Lord AND to the Lord for Justin. Learning to trust now that I'm married has been a beautiful and hard thing, but it's been worth it. SO worth it.

A Blog About Nothing

2010-01-09T12:01:00.003-05:00

My husband just left to go to a gun show in Butler. :)
It makes him happy and I am so glad he is happy.
I hope he has fun.

We had fluffy golden pancakes for breakfast with raspberry jam (and nutella for me).
They were yummy in my tummy.

Work has been stinky lately.
Nice, because I actually have felt more like a nurse lately and less like a babysitter.
Bad, because all the kids are just SO sick and we each have 4-5 of them.
Yesterday I had two kids that made me nervous,
and I am not often nervous at work because of kids. Really.
I'm thinking about them today still, hoping they are doing better.

We are almost through season two of Battlestar Galactica
and as nerdy as that sounds, I LOVE IT!
It is an awesome series.....SO much better than Star Trek.
lol.

Reading a book called "Start Your Family" by Steve and Candace Watters.
They founded boundless.org the webzine that we like to read.
It a book about how babies are blessings and from the Lord
and all the good reasons to start having them NOW!

Not that I really need to read all those reasons,
but I've been curious about this book for months.

and yes, we are NOT pregnant and are still going to wait until later 2011 to start trying.
right now, we just really have a peace about waiting.
If anything changes, we'll be sure to let you all know.
smile.

The Lord has been sweet lately.
I have been loving my iPod listening to worship music
and downloading podcasts to listen to.
Lately, I have been listening to Mark Driscoll a lot.

He is good.
and faithful
and true
and right.

Yes.

Life is good, the end.
And yes, I'm still eating the sugar cookie dough
I made last month to roll out and make cookies with.
Obviously, it never made it that far
and frozen cookie dough tastes WONDERFUL!

What a Difference a Year Makes

2009-12-31T20:20:00.003-05:00

For the last few months, I have just been in awe of how crazy (and wonderful!) my life has been over the last year! Oh my goodness, what a difference a year makes. So, without further ado, here's my year in review.

(haha, that rhymed. Not intentional, I promise.)

January 2008: Trying to make it through my first respiratory season at Children's Hospital, fresh off of orientation.
January 2009: Hanging out with Justin, reworking my resume to apply to work with an orphanage in Moldova and trying to work up the courage to tell Justin that it "just wasn't working".

February 2008: Planning, organizing and speaking at Ground Level's Girls Retreat 2008.
February 2009: Telling all my friends that I liked Justin now, and that I just might be in love with him.

March 2008: Had my first overnight hospital stay as a patient, was despairing of working night shifts, changing to a new migraine medication and had just gotten the BEST present ever, a dishwasher.
March 2009: My laptop BROKE, was working furiously on making things for Etsy, photographing them and just thinking I might be in love with Justin. Since he helped fix my computer and all...you know. AND, the BEST part was that he became my boyfriend (officially) after talking with both sets of my parents.

April 2008: Was in a car accident that hurt my back and then pulled it again a week later lifting a patient at work and got/bought a new camera for my birthday (early present) and was STILL working overnights, becoming convinced of my need for the Lord every day.
April 2009: Loving loving Justin, caught a gastro bug from Children's that Justin helped nurse me through, sent Justin off to Thailand with tears in my eyes, bawled on my floor on the fifth day that he was gone because I missed him so much and decided that I "for sure" needed to marry him. It was here that my heart was convinced and I KNEW I wanted to marry him.

May 2008: Turned 24, working overnight, lost my phone and getting increasingly FRUSTRATED with my single status, signed up for TWO online dating websites to ease my frustration and emailed with Justin online.
Mary 2009: Turned 25 without Justin, spent the most wonderful weekend with him when he got back the next day, was blissfully in love the entire month and was engaged on May 31st!

June 2008: Liking my job again, repainting my entryway, decided NOT to go back to college right now, was LOVING taking an oil painting class over the summer, spoke at Ground Level and surrendered Justin back to the Lord completely (with many tears) since we hadn't emailed in a while and I was pretty sure he was never going to talk to me again (and cause the Lord asked me to).
June 2009: Wedding spreadsheets, counting down the days until the wedding, wedding planning, engagement photos and dreaming about the wedding.

July 2008: Met a another guy online, scrubbed my shower clean of black mold with vinegar and ordered new books online about crocheting. Exciting.
July 2009: Wedding stress, premarital counseling, obsessing about having to use plastic tablecloths at the reception and beginning to pack and MOVE my apartment.

August 2008: My sister had back surgery, I bagged a patient for the first time, saw my first T&A bleed, attended The Call in Washington, DC, stopped talking to the other guy after the Lord tells me that "he's not for you" several times, realized (again) that the Lord was bigger than all my failings and worries and took my first vacation on my own in Tyler, TX.
August 2009: I barely blog anything because I am SO consumed with spending every waking minute with Justin, planning the wedding, ordering things, coordinating things and STILL COUNTING DOWN THE DAYS!

September 2008: Repainted and redecorated the spare bedroom, knit my first pair of socks and become more and more unhappy with just how....mundane my life is.
September 2009: I experience the second best day of my life, my wedding day, I go on a honeymoon and we have our first "real" fight being married. We both survive.

October 2008: I go kayaking for free, decide that work REALLY stinks and I HATE it and spend a women's retreat crying on the floor becuase I just can't see how the Lord is ever going to do what He's promised in my life. I feel boxed into my life and VERY "stuck" where I was.
October 2009: I decide that falling asleep and waking up next to my husband is the best thing in the world, we buy a Canon Rebel, I become a Certified Pediatric Nurse and make some really great homemade tomato soup.

November 2008: I catch a vomit in my bare hands for the first time at work, make some cute cupcakes, begin to work on what the Lord spoke to me about at the women's retreat AND I run into Justin at a church function, we recognize each other and he asks for my phone number.
November 2009: A patient falls on me at work and I hurt my back, I get a horrible gastro bug that Justin gets, too, Justin and I realized just how different we are, I plan to kidnap Bethany, and suffer through 11+ days of yucky toncillitus.

December 2008: Justin and I go out twice, including on Christmas Day to see a movie. It is incredibly awkward and I'm not so sure this is going to work out. I dye my hair shockingly BLACK and worry what Justin will think about it.
Decebmer 2009: Justins grandfather spends 10+ day in the ICU and passes away, we spend our first Christmas together, and we both still can't believe how incredibly blessed we are to be married and have each other.

Sigh.
One year makes a WORLD of difference and that fact comforts my little heart.
Jesus is amazing. Praise Him for this amazing life.

So excited to see what will happen in 2010!
Happy New Years!

My Heart is BURSTING!

2009-12-27T06:19:00.004-05:00

My heart feels heavy, burdened yet so happy and light and it just feels like bursting.
(YES, it can be all of those at the same time! I'm a woman.)

Christmas was just wonderful. We're still celebrating and I am just overjoyed at how everything has turned out. No stress, the Lord has provided for everything, just as He always does! I was able to get my shopping/wrapping done a week PLUS in advance and got to make homemade goodies for other presents. We have been able to see ALL 4 sides of our family and both of our sets of grandparents in just 4 days. It may not sound like great to some of you, but it's amazing to me!! To see that many people in 4 days and have it not feel stressful! AMAZING!

I just love our families and am so thankful for them.

And the Lord. The main reason why my heart feels like bursting. This Christmas I just wanted to cry at how amazing, good, faithful and SWEET our Father is! Just think! Before the world was even FORMED He knew my little frame, my little body, what my life would be like, the choices I would make, good or bad, and he LOVED ME.

HE. LOVED. ME.
(My eyes are welling up here.)
HE. LOVES. YOU!
(ALL of you!)

He loved us enough to create the Earth, even though He knew Adam and Eve would sin and His wonderful creations would be seperated from Him by sin. He KNEW that the people of the Earth would turn away from Him and to evil and He would have to flood the Earth. He KNEW that the Law, the judges and all His miraculous, saving acts of the Old Testament would not free His people, but merely cleanse them. He KNEW He would have to send His ONLY Son as a baby to a filthy manger and a teenager mother in order to redeem and forgive us once and for all. He KNEW His Son would then have to be killed, crucified and He knew how much it would break His father heart. He KNEW He'd have to sacrifice ONE of His children to save His MILLIONS of other children. He thought it was worth it, but it broke His heart.

He knew, and He decided that we were worth all that trouble, pain and suffering just so He could be close to us, speak to us, hold us, rejoice over us, sing over us, bless us, discipline us and LOVE us.

He wanted to know ME, He wanted to know YOU.
He went above and beyond to save us, know us to speak to us, teach us, just to KNOW us intimately.
He goes above and beyond in our lives DAILY, with his grace, mercy and miracles in each of our lives.

Justin and I celebrated that this year. HIS sweet, forgiving, life-saving and redeeming birth. He loves us.

HE LOVES US!
Amen.

That's one thing that makes my heart burst.

Christmas with the Ebel's

2009-12-24T15:30:00.003-05:00

A Sneak Peek

2009-12-19T21:02:00.005-05:00

A Sneak Peek of my Christmas Cinnamon Rolls!
Well....the dough at least.
They made up and cooked up fabulously.
You better hope you're getting a pan.

AND just a peek at the message I found this evening in the shower!
Justin is so sweet!
I love you, too baby!

Pre-Christmas Present Wrapping

2009-12-18T00:22:00.003-05:00

All of our Christmas presents are bought.
All of our Christmas presents are wrapped.

I mailed out thank you/Christmas cards on Tuesday.

I feel accomplished.

::smile::

Whirlwind

2009-12-16T01:40:00.003-05:00

Life always seems to get hectic right as the holidays are approaching. I have no idea why. I always try to plan for the unexpected and schedule in extra free time and grace for myself around this time of year, but it never seems to work. Even this year.

It's really just been a whirlwind for Justin and I these past few weeks. We've both been sick- twice. I have had increasing migraines these last few weeks and had to go back into see my neurologist. I was injured at work. Justin has been increasingly busy at work as the holiday season approaches, as with any church this time of year. We're trying to figure out my work schedule and when we can see all of our families. Plus trying to buy presents. No more than any other American at this time, right? We can all attest though that it's stressful.

For us though, these past two weeks have been stressful. Justin's grandfather went in for open heart surgery about two weeks ago, had multiple complications after surgery and was in the ICU for almost a week and a half. Sadly, Tony passed away on Saturday. So this week has been a blur of funeral arrangements, family flying in from everywhere, the viewings and tomorrow the funeral mass and burial. Tony was a great man whose family loved him very very much. We will all miss him and I will miss not getting the chance to really know him or for our children (to-be) to know him. It's been a hard few days.

Needless to say, I'm excited for Christmas, celebrating Jesus' birth and the fact that He CHOSE to come and live us, and for seeing family BUT I'm really excited for January. I just can't wait to rest.

Pretty Much the Best

2009-11-20T12:46:00.003-05:00

I have the best husband in the world.

Now, I know that there are many of you out there that would argue with me. However, I would disagree with you. Justin Good is the best husband I know. And he's MY husband!

Seriously, I never thought marriage would be this good. I hurt my back at work on Wednesday. Normally, in the pre-Justin-years that would mean hours on the couch, cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner and painful trips back and forth to the freezer for my ice packs. Oh, I forgot. Painful runs in my car to Walgreens for pain meds. This time around, I am appreciating having a husband while I am sick.

Listening to me cry on the phone while he's at work cause a doctor made me mad.
Offering to take me to the ER if I really didn't feel good.
Stopping and getting me stuff at the store on the way home.
Taking care of all the housework once he got home.
Sitting on the couch with me for hours hugging me.
Lets not forget the really bad chick flic he agreed to watch.
Timing my minutes on and off the ice pack.

Seriously. I just look at him sometimes and can't believe he wanted to marry me. I am the most blessed girl in the world. I love our house, I love our relationship, I love working out all the small details, I love laughing with him, crying with him, kissing him. Sigh. Yeah, life is really good.

There are always the bumps in the road.
But now I get to figure them out with him.